My Lord Protector
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Deborah Hale
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Chapter 1
October 1742
“Dearly beloved.” The curate’s whistling treble voice echoed through the vast vaulted emptiness of St Martin’s in the Fields, one of London’s most fashionable places of worship. “We are gathered in the sight of God to join this man and this woman in the bonds of holy matrimony, which is an honorable estate....”
Honorable estate? Julianna Ramsay could barely contain a shriek of bitter laughter. Bondage—certainly. She wanted to tear the prayer book from the curate’s plump fingers and hurl it through the massive window above the altar. She longed to scale the stone pillars and batter the hypocritical smirks off the faces of those smug plaster cherubs.
“If any here can show just cause why this wedding should not take place, let him speak now or forever hold his peace.”
Jerome’s blunt fingers tightened around her wrist. Julianna cast her stepbrother a sidelong glance. Unshaven and disheveled from the previous night’s debauchery, he glared back at her with eyes as black and pitiless as his conscience.
Thick lips curled in a gloating sneer. By all means, sister, he wordlessly urged her, indulge in a fit of hysterical fury. I’ll see you shackled in the bowels of Bedlam before the day is out.
Summoning every ounce of composure, Julianna fought to master her impotent rage. Her features cold and rigid as a marble effigy, she focused her answer into a scornful look. I would not give you the satisfaction, Jerome. Refusing to meet the curate’s questioning glance, she clenched her lips to imprison the words of protest she dared not utter.
A raw autumn wind keened around the church’s lofty spire, nearly drowning out the words of the wedding service. The little curate cleared his throat and pitched his delivery louder. “Dost thou, Julianna, take this man to thy lawful wedded husband...”
Reluctantly, Julianna’s gaze shifted to her bridegroom, Sir Edmund Fitzhugh. He could not have looked less like Crispin Bayard, the man she had hoped to wed. Thinking of her handsome young sweetheart, Julianna’s heart quailed. The words she must soon speak would destroy any chance of a future with Crispin.
Oh my love, her soul cried out across the miles that separated them, how could you have abandoned me to this? Even as that anguished question rang in her thoughts, a countering voice of reason objected. How could Crispin have known, when he sailed for the South Seas, that her father would shortly die bankrupt, leaving her at the mercy of her feared and despised stepbrother?
An expectant silence wrenched Julianna back to the present. Jerome prompted her with another bruising squeeze of her wrist.
“I do.” She fairly spit the words.
The curate smiled indulgently. No doubt he mistook the force of her answer for eagerness to wed a man of wealth and position.
“And dost thou, Edmund, take this woman to thy lawful wedded wife, to live together under God’s holy ordinance...”
While his attention was fixed on the clergyman, Julianna stole a look at her bridegroom. She would have guessed him a former sea captain, even without Jerome’s telling. The intrepid set of Sir Edmund’s broad shoulders and his wide stance bespoke years spent on a pitching quarterdeck. His large hands looked capable of nimbly lashing a sail or holding a tiller steady in rough seas. His firm jaw, slightly cleft chin and the stern line of his mouth all suggested a temperament resolute—even obdurate. His deep-set eyes, which seemed to search out some distant horizon, were cold and gray as the North Atlantic.
Where was the pitiful old wreck she’d expected to find at the chancel steps this morning? That had been Julianna’s desperate plan to foil her stepbrother and to keep herself unsullied for Crispin. When Jerome had demanded she take a husband immediately, she had sent her trusted cousin, Francis, to seek a bridegroom too old and decrepit to consummate their union. Since then, she’d not had a private moment to ask Francis how he’d fared. Noting his complacent manner, she’d assumed all was well.
Jerome’s derisive account of Sir Edmund’s proposal had made him sound ideal for her purpose. “We met at the Chapterhouse while I was posting my notice of the books for auction. He collects book and antiquities. Indeed, he is something of an antiquity himself. Affects to wear his own hair, mind you, though it’s sparse enough in places to excuse a good periwig.”
Antiquity? Under other circumstances the idea might have struck Julianna as amusing. Jerome had overestimated Sir Edmund’s age by more than one good year. Though perhaps not in the peak of condition, her bridegroom appeared well capable of undertaking his marital duties. So much for her pathetic plan.
“...and forsaking all others, keep thee only unto her, until death dost thou part?”
“I do.” The timbre of Sir Edmund’s voice was deep and resonant, with more than a hint of sharpness. Such a voice brooked no dissent from a crew, a household or a wife. And, God help her, she had promised to obey.
A blessed numbness stole over Julianna. Her budding dreams of an unconsummated marriage had died stillborn. Jerome had sold off all her worldly goods—her beloved books and even her treasured harp, insisting he needed the money to discharge her late father’s debts. Soon she would belong to this stern, forbidding man. Yet she was able to view it all calmly, as though this marriage were being perpetrated upon a stranger.
“Who gives this woman to be married to this man?”
“I do,” said Jerome.
To Julianna’s ears, those two short words rang with ten years’ worth of mocking triumph. Her stomach seethed as she caught a whiff of her stepbrother’s breath, putrid with stale brandy. Raising her fan, she fluttered it to disperse the fumes.
Who gives this woman? For most brides those words were a formality. In her case they could not have been more accurate. Her stepbrother was giving her away to a total stranger, with forced consent, for promises of money. Sold, like all her late father’s possessions, to the highest bidder.
“In the name of God, I, Edmund, take thee, Julianna, to my lawful wedded wife. To have and to hold from this day forward. For better, for worse. For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. Till death do us part.”
When her turn came to speak, Julianna’s lips moved but the words emerged scarcely audible even to herself. Looking past the looming silhouette of Sir Edmund Fitzhugh, she addressed her words to Crispin, vowing to keep her heart only unto him.
“I, Julianna, take thee, Edmund, to my wedded husband....”
Her words were barely a whisper, and Edmund had the uncomfortable conviction his bride was staring right through him.
How dare she look so woebegone at the prospect of marrying him? his Fitzhugh pride demanded. After all, this daft scheme had been hers in the first place. When she’d sent her timorous cousin around to advance the idea, he’d found himself with no honorable recourse but to fall in with their foolish plan.
“...in sickness and in health. Till death do us part.”
At that moment, the enormity of what he was doing boxed Edmund squarely in the stomach. Julianna Ramsay looked so very young in her ill-fitting black gown, her ruddy curls all but hidden by a fulsome cap. Though he was barely forty, Edmund had seen and done more than most men twice his age. Years of adventuring in the Tropics had taken their toll on his constitution. At the moment he wanted nothing more than to escape to the refuge of his library with a comfortable wing chair, a pipeful of rich tobacco and a familiar volume of Shakespeare or Marcus Aurelius.
“With this ring, I thee wed....” The words stuck in Edmund’s throat as he thrust the heavy gold circlet onto Julianna’s waxen finger. With effort, he managed to bark them out.
Long ago he had sworn never to marry again. Matrimony did not suit his solitary temperament. He and Amelia had made each other bitterly unhappy during the interminable months of their brief marriage. Edmund had never pretended it was all the fault of his frigid, ambitious late wife. What mad impulse had propelled him back to the altar after all these years?
Edmund stole another glance at Julianna as they knelt to receive the Eucharist The pallid light of an overcast morning filtered through the altar window, starkly illuminating the cruel marks that marred her delicate features—a livid welt on her cheek, dark bruises on her chin, a swollen lower lip. The sight of her—young, vulnerable and so obviously brutalized, called forth every protective instinct in his being. His hands itched to close around Jerome Skeldon’s thick neck. To wrest Julianna Ramsay from the power of that blackguard, he was even willing to thrust his head back into the matrimonial noose.
“Oh God, who hath consecrated the state of matrimony to such an excellent mystery...look mercifully upon these thy servants.”
Edmund took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. For better or worse, the deed was done. In a stroke he had secured Julianna’s safety. He would provide for her every comfort. Surely she could ask no more of him. He would resume his tranquil, well-ordered existence, and try to pretend the disquieting events of past days had never taken place.
As he rose to accept the congratulations of their small bridal party, one thought continued to trouble Edmund. If only he could be certain Crispin would approve...
Skeldon’s carriage rattled over the cobbles of Piccadilly Street, bearing Jerome, Francis and Julianna to Fitzhugh House for the bridal luncheon. Slouched in the seat opposite his stepsister, Jerome drew a flask from his coat pocket and took a long pull. He gasped appreciatively at the liquor’s potency.
With exaggerated care, he wiped the mouth of the bottle on his stock and held it out to her. “Will you join me, milady?”
Julianna arched an eyebrow in disdain, not daring to speak.
“Of course, you want nothing to cloud your experience of this special day.” Jerome sneered. “Is that not so, sister?”
As the barb of her stepbrother’s sarcasm stung, Julianna knew she had only herself to blame. The skies had suddenly opened as the wedding party emerged from the church, spewing a cascade of rain upon them. In the rush toward the carriages, she had deliberately made for Jerome’s. Much as she hated and mistrusted her stepbrother, at least she knew what to expect from him. That was more than she could say of her formidable-looking bridegroom.
Jerome thrust his flask toward Francis. “You more sociably disposed than your cousin, Underhill?”
“Not I,” Francis chirped. “I intend to slake my thirst at luncheon. Julianna’s new husband looks to be a gentleman of quality, and I mean to do justice to his hospitality.”
“Suit yourself.” Jerome shrugged and took another drink.
It had been the same ever since the carriage pulled away from St. Martin’s—Jerome baiting her with surly mock courtesy, while Francis made the most annoyingly good-humored small talk. Both grated equally on Julianna’s raw nerves.
Heavy and tight, the gold wedding band encircled her finger like a fetter. The unnatural calm that had sustained her through the wedding ceremony was rapidly slipping away. Behind that mask of composure cowered a frightened child. Could she truly be the wife of that cold, silent man? How would she survive this day and this night, let alone the days and months and years to come? Only the look of sly satisfaction in Jerome’s eyes forced Julianna to hold her head high and still her quivering lip.
The curate lurched into Edmund’s brougham, water sluicing from the rear corners of his hat. “I must apologize for my tardiness.” He gasped for breath. “While I was changing out of my surplice, the rector detained me for a quick word.”
“I beg your pardon?” Edmund wrenched his gaze back from the window. He was still puzzling over Julianna’s defection to her stepbrother’s carriage. Surprised by the sudden downpour, had she simply acted on impulse? Or had she intentionally chosen the company of that sordid brute, Skeldon, over his own?
“The rector,” the curate repeated loudly. “He asked me to tell you how sorry he was not to preside over your nuptials. If only you’d been in less haste, or if his engagement had been less pressing, I know he’d have been pleased to perform the service.”
Removing his hat, he gave it a little shake. Then he drew out a handkerchief and began to mop the moisture from his face. “A rainy wedding day. That’s considered a good omen, I believe.”
Catching a glimpse of Skeldon’s landau behind them, Edmund muttered, “In Surrey, we say, ‘happy the bride the sun shines on.’”
The curate gave a strangulated chuckle. “And speaking of the bride, where is your lovely lady?”
Was she lovely? Edmund found himself wondering as he explained about the sudden cloudburst and the wedding party’s scramble for shelter in the carriages. No, he decided at last. Not in the conventional sense. Her eyes were an odd color for one thing—the pale amber brown of clear, hot tea. Her mouth was too wide for beauty, not to mention slightly crooked. Or perhaps it was only the bruises that made it look so.
All the same, she had a fey, winsome air that touched him. Somewhere in his dispassionate, impregnable heart, Edmund shrank from the look of aversion he’d seen in his bride’s eyes.
Passing through a half wall of masonry and wrought iron, the two carriages drew to a halt before Fitzhugh House, a spacious red brick mansion with many windows. The rain had eased to a fitful spatter. As Julianna alighted from Jerome’s landau, Sir Edmund stepped forward to take her arm.
A servant in impeccable livery stood before the massive front doors. Sir Edmund nodded toward him. “Let me begin by introducing the steward of my household, Mr. Mordecai Brock.”
The man bowed stiffly. He sported an impressive set of side whiskers, together with the most severe eyebrows Julianna had ever seen. Piercing blue eyes beneath those brows shot her a look of glowering disapproval.
“A pleasure to meet you, Mr. Brock,” she lied.
The steward threw open the doors, ushering the wedding party into a large, marble-floored entry hall. A pair of elegant staircases flanked the spacious chamber, sweeping upward to the second story. The dark wood of their balustrades gleamed.
A veritable army of servants were marshaled in the entry hall—footmen, coachmen, maids of every capacity. Sir Edmund paraded his bride before them like a visiting general inspecting his troops, while Mr. Brock introduced each member of his staff. Julianna scarcely heard him.
Though their names meant nothing to her, the servants’ facial expressions cut her at every turn—contemptuous, boldly curious. Having been on the most familiar terms with her father’s staff, she was distressed by the obvious antipathy of these people. If only she could make them understand how little she wanted to be here. As little as they wanted her, apparently.
The inspection concluded, Mr. Brock whispered a word to his master. Sir Edmund turned to Julianna. “If you’ll excuse me, there is a matter I must attend to.” He motioned to Francis. “Underhill, will you kindly deputize for me and escort my wife into luncheon?”
Francis beamed. “An honor and a pleasure, Sir Edmund.” As he took Julianna’s arm, he gave it a reassuring squeeze.
Her Welsh temper flared. How dare the fool look so outrageously pleased with himself? He was supposed to be Crispin’s best friend. Did he call this friendship—handing his comrade’s intended bride over to a stranger? Using the width of her skirts as cover, she dealt him a sharp kick in the shin. Francis flinched, blinking his mild eyes with a wounded air. She flashed him an answering glare that made no secret of her ire.
As the dining room door swung open, the curate uttered a gasp of delight. Bathed in the soft glow of candlelight, Sir Edmund’s service of silver, crystal and gilded china made the table glitter like an open treasure chest.
“Sir Edmund is a very generous host,” said the curate.
“If not a particularly genial one,” Jerome muttered. Strolling over to the sideboard, he made a great show of inspecting the wines.
Francis held a chair for Julianna. “This is certainly the feast I envisaged. Your father was always reckoned to set a good table, my dear. But this surpasses even the best of his board.”
Looking up from his scrutiny of the wine, Jerome sniffed. “Father squandered his substance entertaining every ne’er-do-well in London. If he’d paid more attention to his business than to his salons, his estate wouldn’t be in such bad pass now.”
“De mortuis nil nisi bonum, ” the curate piously reminded Jerome. “Speak well of the dead.”
“Speak well? I did well to find my sister a husband at such short notice, and her without a penny’s dowry.” Taking a bottle off the sideboard, he poured himself a glass of wine.
Julianna barely stifled her urge to pick up the nearest piece of glassware and fling it at her stepbrother’s head.
“Ah, Skeldon, I see you have anticipated me.” Sir Edmund strode to the head of the table and lifted his own glass. “Let us begin our celebration with a toast to the bride.” Beneath the forced heartiness, Julianna detected an edge of hostility in his voice. Looking from Jerome to Sir Edmund, she recalled a saying of her old nurse. In times of trouble, Winnie had often complained of being caught between the devil and the deep blue sea.
“Permit me, Sir Edmund.” Jerome was beginning to slur his words. “As her brother of ten years, and lately her guardian, I believe I’m best equipped to offer a salute to your bride.”
Julianna felt the blood drain from her face. Salute—Jerome had used that very word last night as he’d ambushed her on the way to her room. Did you think I would send you to bed on your wedding eve without a brotherly salute? Fortunately he’d been drunk enough to slow his reflexes. Wriggling out of his pawing grasp, she’d escaped to the safety of her bedchamber with nothing worse than a bruised face. All through the night she had prayed she would soon become the property of a man too old and ailing to look upon her with Jerome’s brutal lust.
The gentlemen enthusiastically drank Julianna’s health, then settled down to the feast.
“I fear I may never dine so well again,” said Francis, as the servants brought in a course of soup and jellied eels, followed by hot kidney pie.
“Stuffed woodcock.” The curate poised his knife and fork eagerly over one of the birds. “Why, there are three brace of the creatures.” Popping a plump morsel of breast meat into his mouth, he groaned with pleasure.
Under other circumstances, Julianna would have relished such a fine meal, but today she dared not trust a bite upon her heaving stomach. Toying nervously with her food, she noticed Sir Edmund also took small helpings. As she watched from the corner of her eye, he pushed each morsel several times around his plate before lifting a half-empty fork to his lips.
Francis more than compensated for Sir Edmund’s lack of appetite, helping himself to everything as if he hadn’t eaten in months and expected to fast for several more. He and the curate kept up a cheerful banter while Jerome took his refreshment in the form of Sir Edmund’s stock of excellent French wines.
As the footman removed her barely touched plate, Julianna’s gaze strayed to a portrait above the mantel. It showed a handsome woman dressed in the style of the past generation. In her long face and cleft chin, she resembled Sir Edmund, but the lady’s lips were fuller and her eyes looked...familiar.
Curiosity overcame Julianna’s reticence. She leaned toward her new husband. “Sir Edmund, is that a portrait of your mother?”
He started at the question, as though her presence had slipped his mind. Francis and the curate were still engaged in sprightly conversation, while an inebriated Jerome contributed the odd vulgar jest. Almost lost in the hubbub, Sir Edmund’s words were addressed less to Julianna than to the lady in the portrait. To catch his reply, she had to lean closer still.
“Unfortunately I have no likeness of my mother. She died when I was born. That is my sister, Alice. She was some dozen years my senior and a mother to me in every way throughout my childhood. Alice has been dead fully ten years now.”
He seemed on the point of saying more when Francis interrupted with a question. “Sir Edmund, we were just admiring the Fitzhugh coat of arms upon the near wall. Is it true you are heir to a title that dates back to the Conquest?”
With labored joviality, Sir Edmund replied in a louder voice, “The first Fitzhugh did arrive in England with Duke William. However, I come from a long line of younger sons. One Edmund Fitzhugh was a Knight Hospitaller in the First Crusade and a later one fell at Agincourt, ‘upon St. Crispin’s day.”’
That name on Sir Edmund’s lips was almost more than Julianna could bear. She recognized the quotation, from Shakespeare’s Henry V, but never had she made the connection with her Crispin. Julianna caught her husband’s eyes upon her, his expression inscrutable. Perhaps Jerome had told him of her true love, and on their wedding day he meant to taunt her with it.
Under the table, her knees began to tremble. She clenched them together, but the palsy moved up her legs. She had to clasp her hands in her lap to still them. Light-headed, Julianna wondered how to go about excusing herself.
Sir Edmund rose abruptly. “Gentlemen, if you will excuse us, I believe my wife and I will retire. My health is not the best, and Lady Fitzhugh is likely exhausted with grief from her recent bereavement. Please stay and celebrate on our behalf.”
Taking Julianna’s arm, he propelled her out the door before she had time to object or the others had time to reply. Behind them, Julianna heard Jerome give an admiring whistle. “The old devil works fast!”
She tried to swallow the lump in her throat. It felt as big as a whole stuffed woodcock. Perhaps it would be best to get this over with. Nothing could be worse than waiting.
As the door closed behind them, Sir Edmund’s shoulders bowed slightly. “I trust you do not mind leaving so soon. I could not stand to be in the same room with that man for another minute.”
Having no idea what he meant, Julianna nodded dumbly. Sir Edmund signaled a young housemaid. “Gwenyth, show Lady Fitzhugh to her rooms and help her unpack, or whatever she needs.”
He turned back to Julianna, his face looking suddenly drawn and weary. “I am afraid I must make my excuses to you as well, ma’am. I have overexpended my strength these past few days, and must rest. I will come by your rooms later. We can talk then.”
Nodding in reply to his stiff bow, Julianna trailed the maid up the staircase. Apparently she would have to wait, after all.
