The sharp bite of cold against my face was a welcome relief after the warmth of the bar. Having Rowan walk me home…the jury was still out on that one.
“Are you okay?” Rowan asked as we turned north.
I nodded and buried my chin in my scarf. “Great.”
He snorted like he knew the single word was sarcasm. Maybe he did. “You were on your own tonight?”
I shook my head. “No. My friend was there. She set up a date with someone from the app, too.”
“The friend who completed your profile?”
“Yeah. She said I need to get out there more.”
“Bad breakup?” he asked.
I breathed a mirthless laugh. “Something like that.”
“What’s the worst excuse you’ve ever heard for ending a relationship?” He shoved his hands in his pockets and looked at me expectantly. He raised one dark eyebrow and speared me with those dark eyes again. I couldn’t understand how he could see right into me, but I felt it.
Or maybe he just knew more about me than he was letting on. Plenty of people in town were likely more than happy to tell him I wasn’t worth the trouble.
“Worst excuse?” I asked.
He nodded. “Yep. I heard a guy tell his girlfriend they couldn’t keep seeing each other because he hated the color of her hair.”
“What? Did she dye it?”
He shook his head. “Nope. He just woke up one day and decided he didn’t like it. Ended things.”
“Was that guy you?”
He barked a laugh and shook his head. “No. An old friend.”
“That’s cryptic.”
He didn’t say anything else, just kept walking.
“Okay, fine, the worst excuse I ever heard was that she thought he would be different. And this was after almost six months of dating.”
“Thought he would be different. What does that even mean?”
“It means she expected him to be better in bed.”
“Really?”
I shrugged. “Definitely.”
“Was that you?” he asked with a laugh.
“Unfortunately, yes.”
“He sucked in bed?”
“Unfortunately, yes.”
Rowan chuckled. “No one should have to suffer through mediocre sex. Why even bother if it doesn’t blow your mind?”
“That’s what I keep saying. It’s why I haven’t…Anyway, I agree.”
“Why you haven’t what?” he pressed.
“Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”
He pulled me to a stop in the middle of the sidewalk and turned me to face him. His eyes were deadly serious. His shoulders were pulled up to his ears, his feet tapping on the sidewalk. “Why you haven’t what?”
I took a deep breath and found myself unable to lie to him. I did not like that feeling. “Had sex in a while.”
“You? I guess you have good locks on your door.”
“Huh?”
“You had to be fighting them off.”
I snorted. “Hardly. Most of the guys in town grew up with either me or my sister or are friends with my brother-in-law. I’m not new to anyone.”
“You’re new to me,” he said firmly.
My breath hitched. I glanced up at him. He was staring right back, the heat in his eyes chasing away the cold night air.
He stepped closer to me and I forgot how to breathe entirely. His cold hand cupped my jaw and tilted my head up. His eyes held mine, and I leaned toward him. He drew me in slowly, our bodies growing closer together until our lips touched.
We both froze for an instant, like the kiss was a surprise. Then he took a step closer and slid his hand to my throat. He pressed his thumb under my jaw and tilted my head back farther, then licked his way into my mouth.
I moaned softly as his tongue brushed against mine. His other hand reached behind me and brought our bodies closer together. My hands went to his chest, trapped between us but needing to touch him. The thickness of our coats dulled any sensations beyond the kiss, but I didn’t care.
His tongue swept through my mouth and learned every inch. He tangled with my tongue, teasing me before pressing thickly inside. I groaned, wanting more, and he pulled back.
Before I could protest, he grabbed my hand and dragged me down the darkened street. I didn’t ask how he knew which house was mine or how he knew I rented a room above the garage. I just accepted it and unlocked the door.
Inside, he pulled me back in, his hands and mouth learning everything there was to know about me. I nipped at his lip and earned a growl. He pressed my back to the front door and ensured I didn’t move with a thick thigh between my legs.
“What do you want, Willow?”
“Excuse me?”
“What do you want? From me. Right now. Do you want me to go or stay? Do you want me to kiss you or more? What do you want?”
“I want you to take off your clothes.” I’d never been shy during sex. Or really, any other time. I knew I had to take what I wanted from life or I’d never get anything. My parents weren’t warm and fuzzy people, and they never spoiled us, so I learned early I had to grab what I wanted and claim it as my own.
A lot of people said I was a bitch for that, but they were just jealous that they didn’t have the same attitude. I never understood waiting around for something to happen. I made things happen.
And with Rowan, I was going to make this happen. I didn’t plan it. Hell, until he kissed me, I wasn’t even sure I wanted it. But I was going to get it.
He stepped back and dropped his leather jacket to the floor. He toed off his boots as he unbuttoned his jeans. He reached back and tugged his shirt off with one hand. Then his hands went to his jeans and his eyes lifted to mine.
“Am I the only one taking off my clothes?”
I raised an eyebrow at him and grinned. He watched me strip to my bra and panties, both boring teal cotton.
“Don’t stop there.”
“Bedroom,” I told him, nodding toward the only door in the tiny apartment.
Rowan reached for me and brought our bodies together. He brushed the hair from my neck and licked his way from my collarbone up to my ear. He nibbled on my earlobe and across my jaw. When our lips met, he didn’t waste any time thrusting his tongue between my lips.
The entire time, his hands roamed my body, lighting me up. He guided me backward until we made it into my room. He pulled back long enough to see where the bed was. His large hands cupped my ass and lifted me effortlessly.
“You’re going to hurt yourself,” I argued, trying to squirm out of his grasp.
“Not if you stop moving. Damn, woman.”
I stopped fighting him and tried not to worry about him dropping me. A size twenty ass was not usually carried around. I never had been before, and I definitely didn’t expect it from him.
“You’re beautiful,” he said, nipping the exposed skin of my breast. “Stunning.”
I drew in a breath and tried to believe his words, but I knew they were just to butter me up. He didn’t realize I was going to sleep with him whether he complimented me or not. I wasn’t doing it for the ego boost. It was all about sex for me.
He lowered me to the mattress gently and scanned my face and body with his eyes. I wanted to cover up, or kick him out, but I didn’t do either. If he found me wanting, or if this was all a big joke to him, I wasn’t going to back down. I was stronger than him.
Then he licked his lips and pressed his cock against my core. The barrier of my panties and his jeans stopped his progress, but there was no mistaking that he wanted me as much as I wanted him.
“Condom,” he breathed. He reached into his pocket and grabbed one, holding it in his teeth while he shoved his jeans and boxer briefs to the floor. He kicked out of them and tore the foil wrapper while I removed my panties and admired his body.
He was blanketed with muscles. His arms bulged and his abs danced. His cock was thick and surrounded by a neat nest of trimmed dark hair. His thighs were strong, and those hands…they pressed my thighs wide and teased my entrance. One finger slid into me. He groaned with me as he withdrew, coating my skin as he teased his way to my clit.
He held my gaze with his as his fingers manipulated me. I bit my lip and tried to hold back, wanting the orgasm to last. I was on the edge, ready to fall over, but I wasn’t ready. I needed more.
I’d missed the connection sex brought with another person. I missed knowing that we were in it together. For years, sex was just fun, but somewhere along the line, sex became more. Even with strangers, sex was about making sure someone else was happy.
Everyone in my life thought I was selfish, but not during sex. During sex, I wanted to see the man I was with lose his mind. I wanted to watch him go crazy and know I gave him that.
Rowan’s eyes fell to half-mast and he swallowed roughly. His fingers stroked over my clit, pinching and pulling at the throbbing nub until I was unable to hold back.
“Oh,” I moaned. “Yes.”
At the first sign that I was going over, Rowan thrust hard into me and shattered that last little bit holding me back. I broke, my body clenching around him as he pumped in and out of me. I shouted his name, unable to keep it in while my orgasm took control, demanding more from him.
He delivered, leaning over me and letting the base of his cock rub my clit with each stroke while he took what he needed from me.
His grunts and moans were the only sounds he made as he held my gaze from less than a foot away. Closer, I could see the stress in his jaw from holding back. He was waiting for me, wanting to see me lose control again.
And he was getting his wish.
My sensitive skin was raw and ready. It didn’t take long before my body was claiming what it needed and racing to the finish. I dragged my nails down his chest as I came, spurring him on.
He leaned back again and grabbed my hips. He pulled me to him with every rough thrust inside me. He fucked me hard, demanding my body take what he was offering.
I stared at him, his mouth twisted up as if he was in pain. Every muscle was corded tight. His hands bit into my fleshy sides. He was lost, completely gone to the pleasure I was able to give to him. He couldn’t stop the train racing toward him, the desire that had been building all night between us. He needed me, and I needed him.
It wouldn’t last beyond tonight, but for a few minutes, we were one.
He thrust hard into me one final time and stilled. His thick cock swelled inside, then burst, the feeling muted by the condom separating us. He jerked with the release, lost in everything that happened.
I watched him the entire time, memorizing his face and the way he looked. By the time he collapsed onto me, I knew he would pretend it hadn’t happened if we saw each other again. I almost wanted to cry, but I couldn’t let myself when he was still there.
I lay still, waiting for him to regain his strength. When he finally pushed off me, he went straight to the bathroom. He didn’t look at me or say anything before he closed the door.
The air felt cool on my skin. I picked up my panties and slid them back on, then grabbed a robe from my closet. Before he left the bathroom, I went into the kitchen and got a glass of water.
I watched for him to return, not wanting to turn my back and hope he would do something sweet like wrap his arms around me from behind. I knew what this was. I wasn’t going to romanticize it any more than I already had.
His jeans were on and buttoned when he walked out of my room. He looked past me to where he left the rest of his clothes. He didn’t say anything as he got dressed.
I set my glass in the sink and went to the door. “Thanks,” I said as I unlocked it.
“Thanks?” His brows went up.
I shrugged. “What else do you want me to say?”
“You sound like you’re going to slip me some cash on the way out the door.”
“We both know this was a one-time thing. We’re adults, and this doesn’t need to be awkward.”
“Then why are you making it awkward?”
I shook my head. “Good night, Rowan.”
He moved closer to me and stopped right in front of me. “Thanks.” He hesitated, like he was going to do something like kiss me again, then opened the door. “Good night, Willow.”
I forced a smile and waited until he was outside. I closed the door and leaned against it, dropping my head against the solid steel.
“Well, at least I got the cobwebs out,” I told myself. I pushed away from the door and refused to get upset. It was a great night with amazing sex, for both of us. Too bad I’d never see him again.
