Secrets

SHAY

FRIDAY, MAY 20

Today had been one of the worst days of her life. Aside from the night of the accident, of course.

She’d had a deadline for a photo shoot and had already been in the process of emailing the copy to the brand when her laptop crashed. Everything was gone—a whole week’s worth of work down the toilet.

Despite everyone being exhausted, she’d had to reshoot everything and quickly make edits with Dario before sending it over.

She had sent everyone home an hour ago, but she still had to get videos up and into submission—there was just a lot to handle.

Her stomach grumbled. She hadn’t eaten since the night before and it was already 9 p.m. It was raining, and there was nothing left in her fridge—everything had been emptied out at lunchtime. All she wanted was some food.

Walking down the street in the rain, she knew there was a chance of her getting sick, but she was too tired and hungry to care. And she knew there was a place famous for their teppanyaki not too far from her apartment.

She was starving, and at this point any food would be good enough.

“Welcome,” the cashier said when she walked in and shook the rainwater from her coat. “Having here or take away?”

“Take away, please,” she answered, picking up the menu. Her eyes landed on a picture and her stomach growled loudly. Blushing in embarrassment, she apologized to the cashier. “I haven’t had anything to eat.”

“It’s okay, take your time. I can serve you some tea for free if you want,” the cashier offered.

She shook her head. “No, thanks. I’ll get the chicken teppanyaki, with two portions of bean sprouts and the tofu soup.”

The cashier quickly keyed in the order, and she paid without hesitation. She was too hungry to think of anything else.

The cashier led her to a small sitting area where she could wait for her order. The smell of the restaurant itself was causing her to feel faint.

Shay stared at the door as she waited, reflecting on her day.

She was glad that they’d managed to reshoot everything, and even make some improvements. Her mind started to drift, and like it had over the past week whenever it was idle, it inevitably drifted to him.

***

THE NIGHT OF THE ENGAGEMENT PARTY

“Are you okay?”

She nodded her head slowly then took a sip of the water in front of her.

“Don’t like your stepbrother?” he asked, still close to her ear.

Feeling his breath on her neck, she couldn’t help but blush. Everyone else paid no attention to them as they clapped and cheered for the happy couple.

“It’s complicated.” She turned to face him. They were in such close proximity that she could smell the wine on his breath.

“Shay!”

Hearing her name, she whipped her head in the other direction. Her mother was rushing toward her.

She got up quickly and threw her arms around her mother, and her mother returned the embrace.

“Mama,” she said, squeezing her mother tightly. She’d missed her.

“You look beautiful, my girl,” her mother said as she stepped back.

Shay chuckled and shook her head as she stared at her mother. It’d been some time since they’d seen each other, and she realized her mother had aged.

Small wrinkles now appeared at the corner of her eyes, but Zola Haze was still a beautiful woman.

“Now, who is this handsome man?” her mother asked, eyeing Ethan.

Shay’s body tensed, but she wasn’t sure why.

“I’m Ethan Ramsay,” he said, holding out his hand and smiling at her mother.

Shay watched as the guy she had a minor crush on interacted with her mother.

“Call me Zola. I’m Shay’s mother.”

Ethan smiled from ear to ear, and Zola gave Shay a look.

“And who are you to my daughter?” her mother asked boldly.

“Mama!” Shay scolded as Ethan walked to her side, wrapping his arm around her waist. She looked up at him, confused, noting that she was almost two heads shorter than he was.

“I’m trying to date your daughter, but she won’t give me her number.”

Rolling her eyes, Shay huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

“I can give you her number,” her mother said in a flirty tone.

“Oh my god. Stop,” Shay said, looking between them, her cheeks hot with embarrassment. “Both of you stop this. Mama, don’t give out my number to anyone.”

But her mother just cupped her cheek. “Oh, my baby girl, you need some D in you. Forget what your father told you—it’s okay to lose your virginity and sleep around. Hell, I do.”

“Oh my god, oh my god,” Shay chanted in embarrassment as she turned and walked away from Ethan and her mother. She needed space. She’d never been this embarrassed in her life.

Hurrying through the crowd, she ignored anyone who tried to speak to her. She needed to get away.

When she came to a quiet hall, she looked around to make sure there was no one there before leaning her back against the wall and burying her head in her hands. She couldn’t believe her mother said that!

“Your mother is interesting.”

Lifting her head, she saw Ethan walking toward her with his hands in his pockets, smiling coyly.

“Oh my god,” she groaned.

“So you’re a virgin,” he said, stating the obvious. Coming right up to her, he placed one hand on the wall and stared down at her. She stood up straighter and stared back at him.

“I’m an Aries too, but I don’t see how that information is relevant either,” she said boldly.

Which was true, but when men found out she was a virgin, they treated her differently. They wanted her because no one else had had her; they wanted to be the first to conquer. That was one of the reasons she didn’t date.

She hated being labeled the virgin or the prude. She wasn’t a prude, just a virgin.

He stared at her, a smile tugging at his lips, his eyes dark.

Gulping a little, she told herself she wasn’t intimidated. Her eyes flickered briefly to his lips before returning to his eyes.

“Let me take you out on a date,” he said, placing his hand on her waist.

His hands were big, and she could feel his fingers touching her back, softly caressing her exposed skin.

“What do you really want from me?” she asked, and his expression changed, just for a second, showing her a different emotion before returning to his egotistic smile.

“I want you,” he boldly confessed.

“I’m not going to sleep with you. You can treat me like a queen, buy me jewelry, or whatever else you think you can offer, but I’m not going to sleep with you.” She poked his chest as she spoke. “I’m saving myself for marriage.”

“I’m not asking to sleep with you. I would never force you to do something you didn’t want to do. I swear that on my future children’s grave,” he promised, his hand tightening on her waist.

His eyes were on her mouth, so she teased him by licking her lower lip. She knew she should feel scared being alone with a guy she barely knew, but he gave her both butterflies and comfort. Like she’d known him for a long time.

“For all I know, you don’t want kids. So your promises are empty,” she challenged, but her voice was getting softer and her eyes were on his lips, staring at the temptation.

“I want kids,” he whispered, their lips almost touching. “And if you go on a date with me, you can find out more.”

She had no comeback. She couldn’t say anything, not because she didn’t want to, but because her mind was clouded with lust.

“Shay?” A voice calling her name snapped her back to reality, and she pushed Ethan away and turned toward the voice.

“Pete?”

***

“Miss?” Someone nudged her.

“Oh, thank you!” Shay quickly stood up and grabbed the paper bag, then buried her face in it, taking a huge sniff of the delicious aroma. She couldn’t wait to get home. She stepped out of the restaurant and onto the sidewalk.

It was still raining, so she covered the paper bag so the food didn’t get too wet as she walked.

Something struck her from behind, knocking her down. She heard a person groaning in pain and slowly got up. A guy and his bicycle were lying on the ground.

“Are you okay?” she asked, feeling pain in her back.

“I’m so sorry!” the guy said as he got up.

She waved her hand dismissively and assured him that she was fine as she helped him with his bicycle.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” she asked, noticing a gash on his knee.

“Yeah, I’m just so sorry,” he looked at the food spilled all over the ground. “I can pay you back.”

She shook her head and assured him once again that she was fine, then told him to be careful. She knew it was an accident, so she couldn’t be mad at him for it.

Sighing, she picked up whatever food she could and threw it in a trash can. She felt tears threatening to escape; she was starving and didn’t want to go back to the restaurant to order again. Plus, she hated wasting food.

“Shay!”

She looked up when she heard her name being called and saw a black car pull up in front of her.

“Ethan?” She looked like a mess. Food was smeared all over her top, she was soaking wet, and her hair was in disarray.

“What are you doing in the rain? Get in!”

Without a second thought, she ran through the rain, ducked into his car, and closed the door behind her.

“Why are you out in the rain?” he asked again as he stared at her, wide-eyed.

“I’m having a really bad day,” she said, and broke down. She was usually good at keeping her emotions in check, but here she was, crying in front of him.

“Do you want to talk about it?” His voice was soft and caring, so she nodded her head involuntarily as she wiped her tears.

“I mean this in the purest possible way,” he said carefully, “but you’re going to get sick if you stay in those wet clothes. If you want, you could change into my spare shirt.”

Looking down at her wet, stained shirt, she nodded and started to remove her coat.

He reached into the back seat and grabbed the shirt, then passed it to her. Without hesitation, she stripped off her shirt, leaving her in her sports bra, then put on his.

She could smell his cologne on it and was instantly addicted.

“Again, please don’t think this is a ploy,” he said carefully, “but do you want me to take you home or do you want to come over?”

“Uh, my place isn’t too far from here,” she confessed. Throwing all caution to the wind, she gave him directions to her apartment.

She trusted him when he said he wouldn’t do anything, and she realized that her father must know him. If not, he wouldn’t have sat him beside her at their table.

When he pulled into her parking garage, she thanked God that it was underground, away from the rain. He reached back and grabbed a few things before following her out of the car, and she noticed one of them was a paper bag.

“I bought food for myself before bumping into you,” he said, as if reading her thoughts. “We can share if you want.”

She remained quiet as she tagged them up, and they stood beside each other in the elevator in comfortable silence.

She tapped her key card on the blinking door handle before placing her thumb over the small square, and her front door instantly unlocked and the lights turned on. She kicked off her shoes and he mimicked her actions.

As she tossed her key card on the kitchen island, he looked around, taking in the sight of her apartment.

“I’m sorry it’s messy. I had a photo shoot today,” she said, lifting up his borrowed shirt slightly. Her shorts were wet too.

Sighing, she slipped them off without thinking, then grabbed her dirty clothes in her hands and walked to her laundry room, dumping everything in her washing machine.

Staring down at her bare legs, she realized his shirt was long enough to cover her, reaching to just above her knees.

“What happened?” he asked when she returned. He was sitting on one of the bar stools, taking food from the paper bag.

She noticed that his shirt was wet too. “You need a dry shirt,” she commented as she stared at him.

He looked down at himself and nodded.

“Hold on. I’ll change into something else and you can have your shirt back. I can do a quick load and toss it in the dryer.”

“Yeah, that’ll be great,” he said, and she noticed his voice was different, not as cocky and as smug as their first two run-ins.

He unbuttoned his shirt slowly, revealing a chiseled body, and she swallowed, feeling her body temperature start to rise. And when he passed his shirt over, she noticed more tattoos on his body.

“Are your pants wet too?” she asked.

He smirked as he undid his belt. “If you wanted me to strip down to my birthday suit, all you had to do was ask, baby.”

She closed her eyes and, holding her hands to her face, covered them as well.

“If you’re not wearing any boxers underneath, please keep your pants on. I don’t need your butt anywhere near my furniture,” she replied.

He remained silent as she kept her eyes closed, and although it was tempting to sneak a peek, she decided not to.

“I’m not naked,” he whispered in her ear as he handed her his pants. Giving a sigh of relief, she opened her eyes. And there was Ethan, standing in front of her in all his glory.

His body was toned, and she could tell he worked out and worked hard on his body.

Gulping, she took the pants and shirt to the laundry room, where she added them to the load and ran the washer, then walked to her room, avoiding looking at him as she did.

Once in her room, she removed his shirt and tossed it on the bed, then grabbed her favorite hoodie and shorts and threw them on.

“I preferred you without your clothes,” he commented, scaring her half to death.

“Shit, Ethan! You scared me!” she yelled, placing a hand on her heart.

“I told you I wouldn’t do anything, but I’m still a man, and I can’t help staring at a beauty when I see one.” He folded his arms across his chest as he looked her up and down.

She flipped him the finger, then tossed him his shirt while he laughed. She wasn’t sure why, but it didn’t feel awkward having him around. It wasn’t hard to imagine him living with her, to be honest.

But she knew she was taking it too far—she didn’t even want to go on a date with him, and now he’d seen her almost naked.

“For a little virgin, you’re not so innocent, are you?” he asked as she walked past him, heading to the kitchen. He followed closely behind her as he put on the shirt that was just on her.

“I said I was a virgin—I never said I was a saint or a prude.” She allowed her hips to sway a little, smirking at herself. She felt in control, knew he was staring at her, and she liked it.

She hopped onto the kitchen island, where she had a habit of sitting as she ate, and folded her legs. Looking at the spread in front of her, she was glad there was so much food.

“Are you really hungry?” she asked him.

“I just ordered extra. I like to keep some leftovers in the fridge in case I need a snack,” he answered, passing her a fork. “Are you allergic to anything?”

“Nuts, mangoes, and taro,” she informed him.

Nodding his head, he gave her the container of chow mein, and she instantly dug in, feeling relief as her stomach filled up with warmth.

Moaning as her eyes rolled back, she chewed slowly.

“Damn.”

“What?” she asked as she took another bite of food.

“I wonder what you sound like in bed now,” he half joked.

“I haven’t eaten since dinner yesterday.”

“What happened to you today?” he asked, his tone no longer jovial or teasing. She admired that he was able to be serious around her although she was still reserved around him.

Shay explained what had happened, ranting about her day, and eventually she was so frustrated she placed her food down and cried. She wasn’t used to crying in front of others, but with him she didn’t feel the need to hide.

She felt his hands on her outer thighs and looked up as he pulled her toward him effortlessly. Wiping away her tears, she stared at him, wide-eyed, not caring that she looked like a mess.

He stroked her cheek and tilted her head up, and she got on her knees on the kitchen island to meet his height. His hands traveled to her waist.

Throwing her arms around his neck, she hugged him, and feeling the comfort of being in his arms, she relaxed and her tears stopped.

Ethan pulled away, just a little, to cup her cheek and give her a genuine smile. Her breath hitched as she leaned in, waiting for his lips to meet hers, but they never did. Instead, he kissed her cheeks. Kissed away her tears.