Reunited with Her Surgeon Boss
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Amy Ruttan
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14
CHAPTER ONE
YOU’RE OKAY. This is a minor setback. You’ve handled worse before. And who wouldn’t want to work in paradise?
And that’s what Dr. Victoria Jensen had to keep telling herself. This was a good thing. It was an opportunity.
Even though she felt alone again.
Scared, but she wasn’t going to let anyone see that part of her. She’d kept that part hidden since her mother died. As she had no other biological family, she’d grown up in the foster system from the age of ten, bounding from home to home. No one had ever wanted to adopt her, so she’d locked her heart away.
She’d also learned she could either shy away and be a pushover or she could fight for her life.
She chose to fight.
And she chose to help by saving lives.
No one had been there for her growing up, and she didn’t want anyone else to feel alone the way she had. Being a surgeon gave her the opportunity to help others while also giving her the perfect excuse to keep people at a distance. A career that would keep her too busy to even think about committing to a lifetime with just one person. It was better to be a lone wolf. Your heart never had to be on the line if it was just you.
Being a surgeon was what she’d always wanted. Even when she couldn’t always control the outcome.
Which brought her back to why she was here.
She’d lost a patient.
A very important patient. A foreign ambassador to the US.
The hospital’s board of directors had suggested she take a leave of absence until the autopsy findings were released and the media interest died down, and though she hadn’t wanted to agree, she hadn’t been given a choice.
The timing had been fortuitous, though, as her mentor, Dr. Paul Martin, had been asked to go to St. Thomas in the US Virgin Islands to assist with a domino kidney transplant surgery, and Paul had arranged for her to go in his place.
She’d lost patients before and it always stung, but this patient had the press hounding her.
Blaming her.
On assignment in the US Virgin Islands, she could lie low, do her work and wait for the attention to die down.
It was the perfect plan, in theory.
She straightened her white lab coat as she stared at her reflection in the mirror in the women’s washroom and shook away the last tendrils of self-doubt that were swirling around in her brain. Her palms were sweaty, and she hadn’t slept much the night before, but that didn’t matter.
She could shake this off and prove to this hospital that they were damn lucky to have one of the best transplant surgeons working for them. Even for a short time.
Inwardly she cringed at her pep talk. It was something her mentor, Paul, had taught her when she became his resident. Paul had taught her to be confident. To think for herself and exude confidence, which she knew often made her come across as cold-blooded and arrogant.
Be a shark, he’d say—it’s the only way to survive.
He was cool, detached and only looked out for his career and those of the few students he deemed were worthy to be taught by him.
She had been one of them, and for the first time in her life, she had been chosen by someone. It was Dr. Paul Martin who had told her to not get bogged down by a family or love. She had understood that all too well living in the foster system.
Except there were parts of her that didn’t like that. There were secret parts of her that wanted love, security and tenderness.
It was something she had wanted ever since she’d lost her mom.
But she only had herself.
She was the only person who had never let herself down...until she agreed to do the ambassador’s surgery against her better judgment.
In the ten years she’d been a transplant surgeon, nothing had gone as catastrophically bad as the operation that had made her flee New York. And it wasn’t even her fault. She hadn’t wanted to do the transplant surgery. The ambassador wasn’t in a fit state for the operation, and though she told her superiors that the surgery needed to wait, no one had listened.
A chain of events with an unstable patient had unfolded, and though she’d tried everything she could, he’d started to crash on her table. Just when she thought she’d managed to stabilize him and that the transplant might finally take, there’d been a blood clot from the suture line that she couldn’t evacuate, which had ended it all.
The ambassador died.
So here she was in this island paradise, somewhere she could work in peace. Even though New York City was all that mattered and was where her life was, this would be a good change of pace.
The hospital here needed help running a complicated domino surgery for multiple patients who needed kidney transplants.
A domino was for those who needed a kidney and had someone willing to donate but wasn’t compatible with their volunteer donor. So each pair—donor and recipient—were matched with someone else waiting for a kidney who was incompatible with their own willing donor. There were a lot of moving pieces, and it required coordination. Each participant was in a chain, much like a set of dominoes, and if one piece dropped out, the whole thing fell apart.
It could be a logistical nightmare for those unfamiliar with it, but thankfully she’d done domino surgeries before.
Before she got started, though, she needed to meet the new chief of surgery, which was the main thing currently causing her anxiety. The previous chief—the one who had agreed to her coming in Paul’s place—was Paul’s friend, but he’d had to take early retirement for personal reasons, and she didn’t know who the new chief of surgery was. She’d been talking to Paul about it last night, but their call had dropped out and she’d missed the name.
There was a part of her that wondered if the new chief would be wary about her.
If they were a sensible surgeon they’d see that what happened wasn’t your fault. They would know about the complication. They would get it.
Victoria might be a talented surgeon, but she wasn’t God, and there was no way she could’ve stopped that blood clot from forming.
And if it wasn’t for the press unfairly blaming her, she’d still be in New York.
Yeah, and miserable.
Victoria shook that sneaky little thought from her head.
You don’t need anyone else.
Victoria adjusted her brown hair, which was tied back in a bun, except the humidity kept causing strands to escape. Once everything about her appearance was controlled, sterile and clean, she washed her hands and then nodded curtly to the reflection in the mirror and left the women’s washroom.
The chief of surgery’s office was at the end of the hall. Each step from her heels seemed to beat in time with her heart, and she tried to swallow the lump in her throat.
Come on. You can do this.
“Dr. Jensen?” the chief’s assistant—Yvonne, according to her name tag—asked as she approached the office.
“Yes. I’m here to see the chief of surgery.”
Yvonne nodded and smiled brightly. “Just a moment. I’ll check with Dr. Olesen to see if he’s ready for you.”
Yvonne stood up and slipped in the office behind her desk.
Victoria frowned and worried her bottom lip. Dr. Olesen? Surely it was a different Dr. Olesen. There were a lot of Dr. Olesens out there. Fate wouldn’t be that cruel as to put her in the hands of her old rival from her residency days.
Matthew Olesen had been the only man who had ever gotten under her skin. The only resident in their surgical program to be a threat. He drove her crazy, and she had been crazy attracted to him. He had made her blood sing with pleasure.
He had been her first. They had spent so many nights together, and she’d fallen for him.
Hard.
She’d fallen in love with him.
And even though she wanted more, she’d been scared by the intensity of their passion. She was scared of trusting him and putting her heart in someone’s hands.
There had been only one position to work with Dr. Paul Martin in transplant surgery, and she’d wanted it.
Nothing was going to get in her way.
Not even a man she loved...
“You really want to end things like this?” Matt asked, his hands on her shoulders.
She tried to shrug out of his embrace but couldn’t bring herself to pull away from him.
She really didn’t want to end things, but this was better for her heart. She had plans, and Matt didn’t fit in those plans. It was hard to walk away from him, to break the delicious connection when all she wanted was more of him, but she was too scared to risk her heart.
There was no way she could have both Matt and the career she’d worked so hard for.
Love was too complicated.
“Yes. I’m taking the job. There’s one spot and it’s mine.”
Matt let go of her shoulders, and she suddenly felt cold.
“You’re breaking my heart, Victoria. It’s you I want.”
She swallowed back the tears that were threatening to spill. She didn’t cry in front of anyone.
“I don’t want you, Matt. For me, this has always been about the job. That’s all that matters. Nothing else.”
Except it was a lie.
She did want him.
His gaze hardened, and his spine stiffened. “Fine. Then I won’t bother you again.”
It had hurt, but she’d gotten over it.
Have you?
She’d thought he would stay in New York, but he hadn’t.
Matthew hadn’t tried to fight for her, and she’d gotten the message. She was on her own. And that was fair. It was what she was used to. She was used to people leaving her, and she could deal.
She couldn’t rely on anyone but herself.
Have you really gotten over it?
Dr. Matthew Olesen had disappeared from her radar, and she’d never bothered to look him up. It hurt too much, because as much as she wanted to tell herself she was over him, she wasn’t. There was a part of her that still yearned for him and wanted him, but she’d ruined it, and so instead she’d focused solely on her career. She’d dated other men, but no one had ever held a candle to Matt.
No one made her heart beat faster. No one made her body tremble with pleasure with one simple look from his blue, blue eyes. Matthew still owned that small hidden part of her heart that she kept to herself.
You need to get control of yourself.
Yvonne came out of the office. “He’s ready to see you now.”
Victoria nodded and opened the door, holding her breath as she stepped into the room. Her hands were shaking and she was sweating like crazy, hoping that no one could see it.
It wasn’t Matthew.
It couldn’t be him.
His back was to her as he was typing on his computer. His hair was short, caramel colored, and she couldn’t tell much from the back of his head. She stood there, the tension filling the room as she waited for him to turn around and look at her.
Fate wasn’t this cruel.
Look at me, she silently screamed in her head. She wanted to be put out of her misery.
“You’ve come a long way, yes?”
The voice was a bit deeper than she remembered, but it slid down her spine with that tendril of familiarity that sent a shiver of dread and a zing of anticipation racing through her. Her stomach did a flip, knowing what it was like when that voice whispered sweet nothings in her ear as she melted for him.
Oh, God. Not him.
This was like some kind of sick joke.
She was in hell and being punished.
He turned, and her heart skipped a beat as she looked into the crystal-blue eyes of the only man who had ever made her swoon.
The man she’d let walk away. The only man she’d ever loved.
The man who still haunted her dreams, taunting her with something she could never have. Victoria didn’t believe in happily-ever-afters, but a part of her always regretted and wondered if she could’ve had one with him.
And her body was still reacting to him. Even after all this time.
Traitor.
“Dr. Olesen,” she said curtly, trying to swallow the hard lump that was threatening to choke off her air supply.
He smiled, but that smile didn’t reach his eyes. It was cold, detached and hurt, and in trying to avoid his gaze, she noticed the wedding band on his finger. Not that she should be surprised, Matt had always wanted to get married and have a family, and she hadn’t. Or at least she’d told him she didn’t.
There was a part of her, deep down, that secretly longed for those things. But she knew they were just pipe dreams and were not meant to be hers.
Only because you’re too scared to have those things.
“Dr. Jensen.” He tented his fingers and looked at her, a look that chilled her to the bone. “I never expected or wanted to have to see your face again. But here we are.”
