My tongue lolled from my mouth as I panted heavily, my fur matted with sweat. I dug my claws into the ground, tearing up the dirt and grass, howling my misery to the sky.
Adonis lay dying in our room and there was nothing I could do about it.
I tore my way through another training dummy, splinters and stuffing flying to the far edges of the practice field. It wasn’t enough. It wasn’t blood and flesh, bone and sinew.
I needed an enemy.
I needed my mate.
If he were to die, I would tear the world apart. I would rip and bite and claw until the sky went dark and there was nothing but bones and ash around me.
My ears twitched. Someone was approaching me. I’d sent the last away with stitches. Who would dare bother me? Whoever it was, I would make sure they’d regret it.
I snapped and the interloper leaped back, barely avoiding my fangs. Skilled, but not skilled enough. I crouched, ready to leap, to pin them to the ground and crush them.
They dropped to their knees, shouting. “Aarya, stop, it’s me! It’s Sophia! I don’t want to fight you, I just want to talk.”
I could barely see her through the red haze that clouded my vision, but the scent that came was familiar, and her submissive posture appeased me. I approached slowly.
Sophia pressed her forehead to mine. I smelled tears and desperation. “Please, Aarya, listen to me. They’re talking about locking you up! Do you understand?”
I let a growl rip its way out of my chest, pulling my lips back to reveal my fangs. Lock me up? What a joke. I would destroy them if they tried.
Sophia was stroking me softly, hands fisted in my fur. “The cell they used to use for Adonis is still in the palace basement. They’ll put you in there.”
I snorted, shaking my head, trying to get her off. I didn’t care about this. I didn't want her sadness. The destruction of my enemies was what I wanted.
She clung to me, making me look at her, shouting now. “You’re scaring people! We can’t keep them off for much longer. Get yourself together!”
I tried to pull away again, rearing up, but she was hard to shake. She trained with me often. She’d tricked me into letting her get close.
She put her arms around my neck, speaking right into my ear. “Adonis is doing better. His breathing is steady, his heartbeat is strong. Jane thinks he’s going to be alright.”
These words cut deep, pushing through my rage. I hadn’t seen him since they’d brought him in. I hadn’t checked him over myself. Wasn’t I going to be a doctor?
Sophia stared into my eyes, voice firm and quiet. “Devi’s already without her father. She needs her mother right now. She needs you, Aarya.”
My pup. My baby. That was something that could hold even a raging lycan’s attention. When was the last time I’d held her? I felt myself falling out of wolf shape, returning to myself.
A void opened in my chest. I needed to hold her, smell her, needed her more than I needed to breathe. “Take me to my daughter.” My voice was ragged, my throat ruined by my howling, but it put a smile on Sophia’s face.
Having Devi to hold was like plunging into an ice-cold river after a raging fever. My lycan subsided, focused completely on her presence. I wanted nothing more than to curl up with her and sleep.
Instead, I looked up at Sophia. “Thanks for the reality check. You’re an amazing best friend.” Reluctantly, I held Devi out to her. “Will you watch her? I have a lot of catching up to do.”
Sophia took her, smiling tiredly. “Of course. I’m always here for you. It’s good to have you back.”
I called Gabe and Evan, Adonis’ second and third in command, as well as Luke, the head of the royal warriors, and Damien. These were the men who would know what I wanted to know. We met in my office.
I put my hands on my desk, looking at each man in turn. “My mate is wounded. He’s not healing as he should. What do you have for me?”
Luke stood at attention. “Your Highness. I took a squad into the woods when we heard the news. We were able to kill the bear that attacked the king and examine its body. This was no random accident.”
Evan’s posture was so rigid it looked painful. “The bear had a thorn placed high in its gums, deep. It had been purposely provoked and soaked in the king’s scent. Someone wanted it to attack him.”
“Worse than that,” Damien added. “The bear was poisoned, and that poison was passed on to Adonis when it mauled him. I’m investigating, but clues are thin on the ground and there are too many motives.”
I knew what he meant. Adonis and I had plenty of enemies, and many of them weren’t happy with me right now. “The murderer underestimated him. If Adonis weren’t so strong, he wouldn’t have survived.”
Gabe dipped his head. “As you say, Your Highness. Unfortunately, we don’t know when he’ll recover.” I snarled. Gabe swallowed, but he kept his gaze steady. “You need to take his place. I’ll advise you.”
I didn’t enjoy taking his place. It felt like saying he wouldn’t be back. But I couldn’t show that kind of weakness, even now. These men were my subjects, too. “Of course. We’ll start today.”
The men left at my dismissal. I waited a few minutes before following. Riley met me in the hall, surprising me. “Do you have any news? Everyone’s so busy, we have heard little.”
I pushed my hair out of my face and tried to find a smile. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to keep you out of the loop. I only just got an update myself.”
Riley opened her mouth to reply but was interrupted. “Aarya! You’re back, I’m so glad. Are you alright?” Elodie hurried up to us, halting. “Oh! Riley, I didn’t see you…”
Riley looked irritated. I turned to Elodie. “I’m fine. I was just talking to Riley and apologizing for the mystery. We could get dinner later, all three of us, and I’ll fill you in on what I know?”
Elodie was unusually quiet, looking down at her feet. “Oh, um, that’s very nice…”
Riley frowned at Elodie, looking away quickly when Elodie glanced her way. Elodie ducked her head, wrapping her arms around herself. “I can’t make it,” Riley said, coolly. “Just email me.”
She left without another word, back rigid. “What was that about?” I asked, frowning at Elodie.
“I don’t know. I just—I hope Adonis is okay. I’ll see you later, not at dinner, but thanks. Sorry.” She hurried away too before I could say anything else.
Were they fighting? Fresh worry layered itself on top of all the rest, but I didn’t have the time to investigate. They’d just have to be alright without me, for now.
I spared a few minutes to check on Adonis. He slept still, his skin glistening with sweat. He burned under my touch, a fever raging within him.
I kissed his forehead. “Hang in there, my king. Something like this won’t be enough to take you out, I know that. You would never leave me, leave Devi like that.”
He didn’t respond, of course. I longed for his reassuring voice, his powerful arms around me. It was a heavy responsibility to bear alone. “I’ll handle things,” I promised him. “You can count on me.”
The walk to Adonis’ office was long, longer still in the heels I was wearing. But it was important to present strength. Extra height wouldn’t hurt. My makeup was perfect, my suit crisp.
Gabe was waiting at the door. “Your Highness,” he greeted me, bowing. “Are you ready to begin?” I let him open the door for me and strode inside.
I moved behind Adonis’ desk, settling in his chair. Everything was too large, intimidating, and solid. It all reminded me of him, and the lack of his presence ached terribly inside me.
I took a deep breath and folded my hands on the desk. “Send in the first,” I told Gabe.
It was a torrent of visitors, mostly wishing to express condolences and ask when Adonis would be back. By the time an hour had passed, a headache pounded in my temples.
And this was only the beginning.
