My Girl

SAVANNAH

“Okay, Savannah, you’ve got this. You’re a boss-ass bitch, and everything is going to be fine,” I tell myself through the mirror. “You must be nervous,” Erin says from behind me, making me jump.

“I am.” I nod and try to fix my hair yet again. “You never swear,” she comments, taking over my hair for me.

“Never too late to start, right?” I mutter. “Have you talked to Pete?” she asks, ignoring my muttering.

“I tried calling him last night, but he never picked up.” I frown. Usually, if he doesn’t answer, he’ll call me back or at least send a text. But all I’ve gotten is radio silence.

“What do you even see in him? I get what you saw in Tanner. He was the bad boy, the fighter, the flirt. Handsome. Pete is none of those things. He’s boring,” she rants while I roll my eyes. For the first year of our relationship, Erin loved Pete, then one day a switch flipped, and she started hating him, and something tells me it’s more than just him being a defense attorney.

“Can we talk about this some other time?” I snap, getting more and more irritated. Yes, Tanner was all of those things, but things have changed. And besides, Pete is kind, caring, dependable. Well, most of the time.

“I’m kind of freaking out right now,” I say, holding up my hand to show her the trembles I’ve had since I woke up this morning. “Oh, babe. Come here,” Erin says sadly and pulls me into her arms. “Everything’s going to be okay. I promise,” she whispers sadly.

Less than fifteen minutes later, I’m sitting at a window booth at the diner waiting for Tanner. I am fiddling with a sugar packet when I hear someone slide into the seat across from me.

“Hi,” Tanner greets quietly. I look up from the packet and am greeted with tired green eyes. “Hi,” I whisper back. “You look tired,” I comment, then cringe. Why did I just say that?

“I’ve hardly slept since I saw you here a month ago.” He sighs, leaning back and dragging his hand down his face. “Is she really mine?” he asks, locking eyes with me.

“Yes.” I nod, picking up the sugar packet again. Tanner closes his eyes, leans his head back, and takes a deep breath through his nose. “Why didn’t you tell me?” His eyes snap open and are full of what I can only describe as rage.

“I tried to tell you every day for a whole month. I only stopped after you told Mikey to tell me to fuck off,” I snap, surprising not only Tanner but myself. “I never told him to say that,” he bites back.

“Oh, I suppose he just came up with that on his own, did he?” I throw the sugar packet down on the slightly sticky table roughly. “I never told him to! I tried talking to you the Monday after that night, and you ran away, then told your stupid little friend that I had to stay away from you,” he seethes through his clenched teeth.

“I never got her to do that! She tried helping me,” I defend my best friend. “Haven’t you lied enough, Savannah?” I’m taken aback by his words. Never once have I lied to Tanner.

That night in his old tree house, I told him secrets I have never told anyone else. Not even Erin. “This was a mistake,” I whisper to the table when I feel tears beginning to prickle in my eyes.

“Seriously, you’re going to run away again?” he snaps as I begin to get up. I freeze for a moment, take a deep breath, and look back at him, and his stony face instantly softens.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you cry,” Tanner whispers. He said the exact same thing to me four years ago, right after he took my virginity. “Tell me about her,” he says while I’m lost in my memories, ones he probably doesn’t even remember.

“Her name is Rosaline Mae Anderson. She was born December twelfth, eight pounds three ounces,” I state in a monotone. “Why did you name her that?” he interrupts.

“I thought she should have something from her father.” I snort at how that backfired because she’s an exact copy of him. “But she looks like you. The only thing she got from me was the hair,” I add with an eye roll.

“Mae is your middle name, right?” “You remember that?” I gasp, taken aback. “I remember everything about that night,” he states, looking into my eyes. “Tell me. What’s she like?” he urges.

“She is wild, caring, loves everything pink and sparkly, curses like a sailor, loves to dress up,” I list off. Tanner leans back, digesting my words with a small smile on his face.

“Hi there, can I take your order?” a young waitress chirps, breaking him out of his thoughts. “Ah, yeah, can I get the pancakes and a coffee, please?” Tanner asks, handing her the plastic menu he didn’t even open.

“Me too, please.” I smile, handing her the one sitting in front of me. “No problem.” She smiles kindly before walking off.

“Has she ever asked about me?” Tanner asks, leaning forward to rest his elbows on the table. “No.” I shake my head, making him frown. “Although when Jax broke his arm, she asked if he punched someone because her daddy used to,” I add, making his lips twitch slightly.

“Did you know he was my brother?” “No.” “Would you have let them be friends if you knew?” “No.” “He seems very…protective of you and Rosie,” he says, pausing to find the right word.

“I’ve never seen him like that before,” I say. “He had a fight with Dad, then took off.” Tanner sighs, leaning back again, picking up the sugar packet I’d been playing with.

That night, he had told me all about his father. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, my life is great but my dad, man,” Tanner slurs as we sit cross-legged in an old tree house in his backyard while our classmates party inside his house.

“He has these expectations, ya know?” he continues. ~“I get it,” I agree, knowing exactly what he’s saying.~ ~“I told him I didn’t want to go to college. I want to be a builder and holy shit.” He shakes his head with a humorless laugh.~

“‘You’re wasting your life, Tanner. You’ll never amount to anything,’” he mimics, taking a swig of the bottle of rum in hand. ~“I got a B, a fucking B, on my math test, and he flipped his shit. Threw Mom’s stupid figurine at the wall.”~

“When we got home, he told me to stay away from you again.” Tanner chuckles, shaking his head. “I think he thinks I just want to sleep with you,” he says just as the waitress comes by with our food.

Her face turns bright red as I’m sure mine did too because it feels like it’s on fire. “I told him he should be worried about you trying to kiss me again.” He smirks, and I gasp.

“You did not?” “No.” He laughs, picking up his coffee and taking a small sip. “You have a boyfriend?” he asks, but it sounds like a statement.

“I do. We’ve been together two years.” I nod, unraveling the cutlery from the napkin. “Does he live with you?” “I thought you wanted to talk about Rosie not my love life,” I state.

“Well, if he lives with you, he’d live with Rosie.” “No, he doesn’t live with us. Erin does,” I answer, pursing my lips slightly. “Two years together and you don’t live together? What’s wrong with him?” Tanner snorts.

“Neither of us have ever brought it up.” I shrug. Truth be told, I don’t think I could live with Pete anytime soon. His house is always immaculate, and neither Rosie nor I are the tidiest of people.

“Can I meet her?” The question I was dreading. “How do I know you aren’t a criminal or drug lord or something now?” I say without thinking. Tanner looks at me with a straight face before bursting out into laughter.

“Do I look like a criminal?” he asks, very amused. “White collar crime exists, you know?” I mutter, cutting my pancake a little too aggressively.

“Fair enough,” he replies, still clearly amused. “I actually ended up going to college. In New York.” My eyebrows shoot up in surprise, he was so set on not going. “I just finished my architecture degree and moved back until I find a job. No girlfriends, no other kids. Definitely not a criminal or drug lord.” He chuckles.

“I-I need to talk to her first,” I stutter out. “She has to agree,” I add. “Of course,” he agrees straight away.

Tanner and I exchange numbers before he pays the bill for both of us. “Think of it as my first child support payment,” he jokes when I protest.

As I’m walking home, I decide to call Pete again. “Hello, Peter Mulholland’s phone, Juddson speaking.” “Ah, hi?” I say, confused. Why the hell is Juddson answering Pete’s phone, unless there’s another Juddson?

“How can I help?” Juddson states professionally. “Um, I just wanted to talk to Pete.” “He’s currently in a meeting. Can I do anything for you, ma’am? I’m his intern.” In a meeting and he’s getting his intern to answer his personal phone?

“No, thank you. Can just you let him know I called please?” I ask, chewing my lip. “Of course. Can I get your name?” he asks, and I stop in the middle of the sidewalk. He doesn’t have my number saved?

“Savannah.” “Savannah. Anderson?” Juddson’s tone completely changes from professional to skeptical. “Yes.” “Oh wow. Um hey. It’s Juddson. We went to school together. I’m Tanner’s buddy,” he rambles.

“Yeah, I remember you,” I tell him. “Tanner’s back in town. Shit. Sorry, I don’t know why I said that,” he blurts out, making me chuckle slightly, and I start walking again.

“Anyway, what do you need a lawyer for?” Juddson asks, going back to his professional voice. “I don’t. I just wanted to talk to Pete,” I tell him as I reach my apartment building.

“No offense, Savannah, but it’s a bit weird to call a lawyer for just a chat,” he teases. “Pete’s my boyfriend.” I laugh again, pushing open the main door.

“What? Savannah he’s—” The rest of Juddson’s sentence is cut off by noises on his end of the line. “Yes, Ms. Anderson, Mr. Mulholland is just out of his meeting now. I’ll see if he’s free,” he states in a professional tone.

I try to listen to what is being said, but they’re either talking too quietly or he covered the phone. I hear some shuffling as I push the door to my apartment open. “Hey, babe,” Pete greets.

“Hey you.” I smile as I throw my bag carelessly onto the sofa and flop down next to it. “Good meeting?” I ask, kicking my sandals off and putting my feet on the coffee table.

“Long.” He sighs. “Should I come take you out for lunch?” I ask, wriggling my toes. I really should paint my nails again.

“Don’t you have Rosie today?” “No, she’s at daycare until three.” Would it be so bad if she came along? I literally have to bite my tongue to stop the rest of my sentence.

“Sounds good. Noon okay?” “See you then.”