Savage

SAGE

The rest of the day just went by in a haze. Ronnie got so tied up with work that I didn’t even get a chance to run the situation by her.

Then she left to go hang out with her nieces and nephews as she promised. When I got to yoga class, Soraya was the first to notice that I wasn’t as chatty as I normally am. We began setting up our mats in the studio when she started annoying the fuck out of me. Finally, she asked what was wrong.

“Come on, Sage, what’s wrong? You’re more grumpy than usual,” she said. I shot her an irritated look.

“I’m not in the mood,” I sighed.

“Are you sure? Because your face is telling a different story.” I sighed again. Then caved.

“My boss asked me out on a date.”

“Eeh. That doesn’t sound too bad. You’ve known Ronnie for a long time, so that should be fun,” she said, side-eyeing me.

I gave her a nasty look.

“You love to joke. I’m serious, smart-ass. I’m talking about Mr. Heinrich.” She laughed, “You must learn to take a joke. Even when you’re serious.”

She continued laughing.

“It’s bad. He’s my boss and you’re at uni. What do you know about dating?” I began prying into her life.

Then she said something I didn’t expect.

“Enough to tell you not to let the opportunity pass you. You never know. Suppose he’s the one. He is just wearing a title and you’re really going to let that stop you?”

“Yeah, but what if it doesn’t work out,” I rebutted. “We work together. I work for him. It will be awkward.”

“What if it does work out,” she said nonchalantly, as she sat down on the mat in a meditative position. “You have to try, Sage.”

“I’ll think about it.”

“You go on and think about it. Mind somebody else tries to act on it and steal his attention away.” “If he’s for me. He’s for me,” I stated a bit too strongly for my liking.

Soraya ignored me.

“Isn’t he the same boss you and Ronnie call Mr. Finerich?” “Yes.”

“You have no imagination,” she finished.

Her attention switched to her phone in hand, which led her to ignore me for the rest of the class.

I was stunned that Soraya was open to the idea that I overlooked Mommy setting up next to me. She had her ears cocked this entire time. It was evident that she heard our conversation. “Sage, I don’t believe you should do it.”

“Why’s that, Mommy?”

I didn’t bother to scold her for eavesdropping.

“Suppose you lose your job because of it. He won’t lose anything. You can lose everything. Really think about it before you do anything rash.”

I remained silent for the rest of the class. I felt claustrophobic. Instead of becoming relaxed during the class, tension built inside of me, stifling any rational thinking that should take place. I didn’t like this feeling. It was not me. I needed to feel connected to some form of logic. I needed everything to make sense again.

I didn’t know what to do. I’m curious, but I don’t know if I want to risk it.

Looking back at Soraya and Mommy as the class ended warmed my heart. It was always nice to use Patois every once in a while. It reminded me of where I am coming from. The sun and outdoors connected us with nature. Jamaica. Farming in the country was therapeutic to me. It brought my family and me together, which I loved. It gave me a sense of purpose. To feel the earth between my fingers and toes was beneficial. Groundation.

Mommy, Soraya, and I said our goodbyes before driving off in opposite directions of each other. The ride home was quiet, too quiet. I began playing some reggae music to put my mind at ease.

When I got home, I threw my clothes on the ground in a heap and went straight to the bathroom. I needed to get the sweat and the stress off me. The warm water was a relief that I welcomed. The water seeped into my skin like a calming balm.

***

Medication - your medication makes me high. Just be patient - I’m like a patient trying to find. Levitation - Run your fingers down my spine. Elevation - your medication makes me high, yeah.

I lay down on my bed with my hands spread open. Stephen Marley’s melodious voice filled my ears with his lyrics. Medication - Since I got back from yoga class, I laid limp in the bed after my shower. Your medication makes me high. The music fills the void of my empty apartment. Empty in the sense where no one but Olaf, my shaggy, marmalade fluff-baby, and I were home, alone. Olaf curled next to my head in his usual sleeping position. I could tell he was happy by the way he purred against me. His claws would occasionally jut out when he stretched to scratch at nothing now and then for comfort. My eyes wandered around my bedroom. It was a massive square box that had my bed on one wall facing two sets of windows. Twin nightstands on either side of the bed, and lamps perched on top of each of them. Two chests of drawers stood tall on opposite sides of two walls. Polished wooden flooring matched the wooden ceiling, a ceiling fan hung over my bed, and two framed images of my family and Olaf hung on the wall behind my bed frame. I have a walk-in closet to the wall that is beside the windows. I loved my room very much. A lot of backbreaking was put into getting it to fit my taste. My decision on where I wanted to live was made with much thought behind it. I had to live in a location that was not too far from where I traveled to work or buy groceries. I didn’t want to be bombarded by a lot of traffic either.

My apartment was on a complex in N. Milwaukee Ave. Its interior was pale lavender, with a wooden ceiling that stretched from my foyer to my kitchen. The living area has a large green sofa that can seat four people. Two armchairs that match each other, a plush forest green carpeting, and a brown coffee table that separates the sofa from the forty-inch flat-screen television that hung on the wall. Floating shelves. A wide dining room table of oak with intricate swirl carving was set behind the sofa. In front of the living area, are two huge glass windows with French arches overlooking the city’s infrastructures and roads. Adjacent to the living area was my kitchen which had a large island made of dark granite and the stove, fridge, and cupboards were built into the area behind it. At the back of the kitchen area was a small passage that had two doors across from each other. These were bedrooms, one of which was mine. Each had en-suite bathrooms. Which was perfect for when Mommy and Soraya came to stay with me or Ronnie.

I shook my head to snap out of this distraction. Just be patient. I needed to focus on making the right decision. A sigh escaped, and I rolled onto my side that had a view through the window. I was so caught off guard by Mr. Heinrich’s invitation that I went through the rest of the day like a zombie. I can’t think straight. My eyes fluttered closed in an attempt to take deep calming breaths.

I lay there in bed feeling my eyelids getting heavy with sleep when they refocused on a bracelet on my nightstand. Tears pricked the corners of my eyes as the memory of Wong came flooding in. - I’m like a patient trying to find.

I stretched for the phone that was in front of the bracelet. I wondered how long I left it there.

Five minutes later.

I rolled onto my back again with some relief. I thought everything through thoroughly, and I now know what decision I have to make. Levitation - Run your fingers down my spine.

Elevation - your medication makes me high, yeah.

I felt the heaviness on my eyelids more prominently. It became unbearable. My mind began to unwind as Damian, and Stephen Marley lulled me to sleep.