Her Monster

ERICA

I spent the rest of the weekend cleaning the house and making it habitable. I also learned that my cooking skills were nonexistent. I managed to burn a hole right through a frying pan. I did laundry and moved my things into Gran’s bedroom. Her bigger bed was more comfortable, and the shower was a dream.

Sunday evening found me looking through old photos and watching TV, which surprisingly still worked. I found the box of letters my gran mentioned, but I was hesitant to read them. I wanted to forget about the past, not relive it. I had managed to block out most of what happened that night, and the last thing I needed was to be plagued by nightmares.

A commercial for the latest cell phone caught my eye. I’d never had a cell phone, and I wanted one. Perhaps Walter could tell me where to buy one. If I planned to stay, I might even look into getting a computer.

In a way, I so desperately wanted to experience everything I missed while I was locked away. Maybe acquiring the trappings all other teenagers had would give me a sense of normality.

By ten p.m., I got into bed. I was anxious, tossing and turning. Plus, the howls of wolves kept me awake. Wolves? I slipped out of bed and walked to the window, scanning the small backyard facing the tree line.

The moon was full, and I stared at it, feeling something tug deep inside me. The howls drew my eyes back to the forest, but I couldn’t discern any movement.

I slipped back under the covers, but it took me a long time to fall asleep. The beeping alarm clock woke me, and I wished I could’ve called Walter to tell him I wasn’t coming. If only I had a cell phone… What if all the people in his store treated me like Kerry did?

I got up, showered, and dressed in jeans and a T-shirt. I didn’t have a huge variety of clothes and hoped what I was wearing was suitable. I braided my damp hair. It hadn’t been cut in six years and was now grazing my bum. I pulled on my worn-out sneakers. I should have bought a new pair yesterday, but I had been wearing sandals and hadn’t thought of it.

Freedom to purchase what I needed hadn’t really hit home yet.

I made a cup of coffee and drank it as I sat on the porch step. It was so quiet and peaceful out here. The warm air and the smell of the forest quieted my restlessness and anxiety. I’d spent happy summers here, meeting up with other kids, always outside playing.

There was a small bench on the porch, but the legs on the one side had fallen through a broken plank. Maybe it wasn’t such a bad idea working in a hardware store. If I could learn how to fix a few things myself, I’d be able to repair things around the house, giving me something to do on the weekends. Judging by Kerry’s reaction to me, I was doubtful I’d be getting invitations from the kids I’d met here when I was younger.

The longer I waited for Walter, the more nervous and unsure I became. What expectations did he have? I jumped up when I saw his truck pull in the driveway. His wide smile indicated that he was pleased to see me. I ran back inside, dumped the coffee cup in the sink, and hurriedly locked up after fighting with the door.

As soon as I got in the truck, I asked Walter, “Are you sure this is a good idea?”

“Good morning, Erica.” He grinned, touching my shoulder and giving it a squeeze. “I think it’s a very good idea. Just relax. I will be around all day; nothing bad is going to happen.”

I nodded and took a deep breath as he reversed out of the driveway. “What happened to the neighbors? It doesn’t look like anyone lives here anymore.”

“Well, I don’t know if you remember Mrs. Norse?” He pointed to the property on the left. I nodded, but the memory was vague. Even then she seemed ancient, and I hadn’t paid much attention to her. “She passed away about two years ago, and the house has been empty ever since.”

Walter pointed to the third house on the street. “And Mr. Hardy is visiting his family and won’t be back for another month or so. You’ll like him.” He paused, glancing over at me. “There is no crime here. Alph—uhm, Wade makes sure of that.”

I remembered Wade. He was that tall boy I played with, towering over all the other kids. Dark blue eyes and brown hair that hung over his eyes. I’d had a crush on him, even though he kept tugging my braid. Was he a cop? Oh God, he would know about me, the murderess in the midst.

“Is he…uhm…a cop?” I asked, trying to sound nonchalant.

“We don’t really have a police force, as such, so Wade is like a volunteer.”

The truck came to a stop, and I looked at the large building in front of us. Downey’s DIY. Holy crap, this was not a small business. All my questions about Wade disappeared as I stared at the large shopping center in front of us.

Walter sensed my unease. “We stock more than just hardware here. Because we are so far from the larger cities, we stock all sorts of things: building supplies, hardware, garden accessories. We even have a clothing section. Come on,” he said, climbing out of his truck. “You’ll be working with my favorite person today.”

“Who is that?” I asked, sliding out of the truck and closing the door.

“That’s not closed, honey, you need to use a little more force, really slam it shut. This truck is older than you, much like your front door,” he chuckled.

The door hadn’t latched, so I opened it again and slammed it closed while Walter waited.

“So, who is your favorite person?” I repeated.

“Me,” he grinned. He shook his head, seeing my expression. “Nah, you will be working closely with Ben.”

He grabbed my forearm and walked me inside. I felt like a little girl whose dad was making sure she didn’t run for the hills. Why couldn’t Ben be a woman? I had so little experience with men, most of it bad. They intimidated me more than I wanted to admit.

I looked around in astonishment. The place was huge. I could see the demarcations of the different sections, just like Walter said. In the middle was a circular counter with no less than three registers, although not all were currently manned.

I followed Walter to the hardware section. We went all the way to the back where two desks were set up, both with laptops on them. Behind one desk sat a man who was currently on the phone, typing away on the computer. He had gray hair and looked to be the same age as Walter.

He looked up when he saw us, waving a hand at the chairs in front of the desks.

“Ben has been with me for decades. He knows everything there is to know. You will be shadowing him, and he will teach you the ropes,” Walter explained, sitting down. I followed suit, feeling very apprehensive.

I glanced up as Ben ended the call. He stood up and, with a smile, bent forward to shake my hand. I stood hesitantly and put my hand in his.

“Welcome, Erica. I was about to quit if Walter hadn’t told me he hired you. I’m in desperate need of a helping hand.”

“Pleased to meet you. But you should know that I have never worked, and I don’t know how to use a computer,” I babbled nervously.

“Don’t you worry about a thing. That’s what I’m here for.”

“Right then.” Walter turned to me. “I have an office up there.” He pointed his finger to the row of offices accessible via a metal staircase. “If you need anything, just come on up. I’ll check in on you later, see if you’re still alive.” He laughed outright at my dismay. “You’ll be fine,” he reassured.

Ben took me on a tour of the store and got me a store uniform, which was black jeans and a red T-shirt displaying Downey’s DIY on the front. I also had to wear work boots for safety.

Ben did his best to explain things to me. Although he was clear and concise, I couldn’t understand everything he said. It was a whole different world, and I had zero experience. He kept telling me not to worry and that it would take time to remember so much information.

By lunchtime, my head was spinning and I needed five minutes to myself. But for the life of me, I couldn’t remember the direction the restrooms were in.

“Walk toward the offices, and turn left. There’s a hallway. You’ll see the sign,” Ben directed.

I heaved a sigh of relief when I found them. I locked myself in a stall, and thankfully there was no one else in here. I closed my eyes and took deep breaths. I was right to feel anxious this morning; this was harder than expected. I didn’t think I could do this. I was way out of my comfort zone—even the number of people working here intimidated me. It didn’t help that most of them were men.

I washed my hands and face. I hated to disappoint Walter, but I couldn’t handle this. I pulled the door open and made my way to the stairs that led to his office. I was going to tell Walter thank you, but no thank you. If I was frugal, the money Gran had saved could last a long time. I was about to go up when I heard my name. I turned and crashed into a hard body.

I jerked back like I had been stung. “Sorry,” I muttered, stepping around the man.

He stepped with me, blocking my path. Two hands gripped my shoulders. It felt like I had been electrocuted. I looked up, and up. How tall was this man? And stared into deep blue eyes.

“Ma…. Erica,” the man breathed, his voice deep and velvety smooth. I froze, unable to respond.

Seconds ticked by. Deep down, I knew who this was. He looked the same, just older. The dark blue eyes as mesmerizing now as they were then. He’d become a man. His face had a five o’clock shadow, which made him even more handsome. Muscles strained under his T-shirt.

In the distance, I heard someone call his name, breaking the spell. I tore myself away and ran for the store entrance.

Once outside, I didn’t stop running until I made it to my porch. I stopped in horror. Across my front door, someone had painted “MAN KILLER” in big red letters. I shoved the door open, sank to my knees, and sobbed in anguish.

I wasn’t welcome here and never would be. I needed a fresh start where no one had heard of me. Curling in on myself, I cried myself to sleep on the hard floor.