Nicole Riddley
MELISSA
“You need a hobby,” mutters Hailey after blowing her long pink-and-blue bangs off of her face.
“Hot boys are my hobby,” replies Lauren. “Speaking of hot boys, where is your boyfriend, Mel?”
I shrug my shoulders. I’m exhausted, and I couldn’t care less. I’m currently seeing Emmet Winterbourne. Filthy rich and the captain of our basketball team, not to mention the star of water polo—that’s Emmet.
It’s rare that a senior, especially one as popular as Emmet, pays attention to a sophomore but, for some reason, he seems to like me.
The Winterbournes are from old money and highly respected. He’s from the right family and perfect for me, according to Mom. When he kept asking me out four months ago, Mom told me to accept it, so I do.
“I think he’s with the team, cleaning up the mess they made at John Winston High,” I tell Lauren, leaning heavily on her as we climb up the few steps to the main entrance.
John Winston High is a much bigger school than ours. It is a public high school and also our biggest rival. Despite having much bigger funds and better facilities, we lost the last championship to them.
The rivalry went up another level after our loss. The members of the two teams started playing pranks on each other. At first, it was just stealing flags or hanging up banners and making fun of each other.
Now it involves fights and destruction of property. Last night, I heard that our team went and dumped garbage all over their gym and spray-painted the walls.
“They started very early this morning and will probably be there through lunch and after school. I think the coaches have had enough of it, no matter how much money their families piled on the school,” I explain.
“No offense, but your boyfriend is an idiot,” announces Hailey.
“None taken,” I tell her. Emmet’s not too bad, but he can be a tad snooty and also an idiot at times.
“All boys are idiots, especially hot ones,” replies Lauren. “That’s a given.”
“Speaking of idiots, where’s that lovely sister of yours?” Hailey never makes it a secret that she thinks Luella is an idiot as well.
I spot Luella’s robin’s-egg-blue Miata next to a white Mercedes and a red Audi, but I don’t see her around. She, her friend Jesse, and a few other girls usually hang out near Emmet’s group of friends.
On mornings like this, they’re usually near where Emmet parks his car or if they’re inside, they would all be in front of Emmet’s locker. Right now, I’m not surprised that Emmet’s silver GT Roadster isn’t here.
The moment we step inside the walls of Belfountain Academy, I feel it—strange energy in the air, making my own buzz in response. I look around but I don’t see anything out of the ordinary.
Luella and Jesse are standing just outside the office door, discussing something. She glares at Hailey as we walk past. “What are you looking at, freak?” she says to Hailey.
I think the one person Luella hates more than me is Hailey, and the feeling is mutual. I don’t remember if they ever fought over anything specifically, but Luella and Hailey have been mortal enemies for as long as I can remember.
Hailey smirks and says, “I thought I was looking at a donkey’s a-hole, but then I realized it’s just your face.”
Oh my God! I face-palm, and Lauren bursts out laughing. Luella gasps. Her face rapidly turns bright red with anger.
I grab both Hailey and Lauren by the arm and drag them away before Luella recovers and comes up with another insult.
Not that I think Luella will ever let this go. I’m sure she’ll come up with something when she catches up with us later.
When we reach my locker, I take a deep breath and lean against the cool metal in exhaustion. The initial surge of energy that I felt is now gone, and fatigue and pain seep through my body like venom.
I don’t understand what’s happening.
“I’m sorry I insulted your sister again, Mel, but she started it!” says Hailey.
She probably thinks I’m upset about what’s just happened as I stand there in silence. I’m actually wondering if I can make it through the day.
“Real mature, Hails,” says Lauren. “Not that I don’t think it’s funny.”
“And are you really sorry?” I ask Hailey. My lips curve up into a grin that I can’t hide.
“No. Not really,” answers Hailey truthfully, after a bit of a pause.
“I don’t think you are, either,” I say as I push myself off the locker to unlock it. I transfer the books from my bag into the locker slowly while Hailey throws everything into hers haphazardly.
While my locker is neat, Lauren’s is cute, and Hailey’s is a disaster.
“Oh, ummm…wow,” breathes Lauren.
I turn to look at Lauren who’s standing beside me like a statue. Hailey is also staring at something behind my shoulder without blinking, which is rare for Hailey.
I suddenly notice that the hallway has grown quieter than normal. I follow her line of sight to two tall figures striding purposefully down the hallway. It’s clear, even from here, that they’re unusually beautiful looking.
Easily the most good-looking boys I’ve ever seen. No wonder everybody is staring.
One has messy, raven-black hair that contrasts greatly with his very fair skin. From where I’m standing, I can see his prominent high cheekbones, sharp angular jaw, perfectly straight nose, and full red lips.
Something is happening to me as I’m gazing at him. I’m drawn to him, but it’s not just because of his good looks; it’s something else. The energy in me is pulsating, barely contained.
I have to peel my eyes off of him to study the other one next to him who also has fair, flawless skin, but his hair is very pale ash-blond with light golden streaks.
His features are also sharp and prominent. His hair is slicked back from his beautiful face with a few golden locks falling over his thick, golden eyebrows.
There’s a certain glow about them that makes them seem like they don’t belong in this world. There’s also that buzzing crackle of energy in the air. The closer they get, the stronger that energy feels.
When they’re about ten feet away from me, the steps of the black-haired one falter. The energy in me rises further. Uncontrollable. He looks around and his gaze clashes with mine. Blue.
Electric blue, his eyes. Bluer than the sky. I let out a gasp as a white-hot spark races through my body, zapping right through my fingertips. I fist my hands and hide them behind my back.
His dark eyebrows furrow as if he’s puzzled before he looks away, dismissing me. He looks at his friend with the blond hair.
His friend shoots him a questioning look, then his bright green eyes give the crowd a cursory glance as they resume their walk.
They walk past us, and that’s when I notice that the raven-black-haired one has his arm around Luella. He’s gazing down at Luella as if no one else exists.
Red-hot fury races through me, causing blistering energy to surge through my body straight to my fingers. I’m shaking, trying to contain it.
“Excuse me.” I run to the nearest washroom, leaving Hailey and Lauren calling after me.
The washroom is empty. Maybe because the bell has already rung. I hold my hands out in front of me. They are shaking.
Pure white lights are flickering between my fingertips, zapping and angry-looking—like they’re snapping at each other. I don’t know how the lights from my fingertips seem angry, but they just do.
I close my eyes, trying to rein in my emotion and control the raging energy. Why am I feeling this way? Why is that boy affecting me so? Why do the two boys seem so different from everybody else?
A low, sinister laugh bounces around the empty washroom and my eyelids fly open. The lights overhead flicker. I grip my bag and run out without looking back.
I don’t want to see, and I don’t want to know, what kind of creature laughs like that. I avoid washrooms for a reason.
***
“Where were you?” asks Hailey as soon as I join her at the lunch table. Lauren leans in closer and stares at me, also waiting for my answer.
After the washroom, I went to see the nurse. I told her that I just needed to lie down for a while because I wasn’t feeling well.
She offered to call my parents, but I told her that my parents were away, and that I didn’t think it was anything serious. Thankfully, she left me alone after taking my temperature.
I’m very sure my parents will be informed about it later, but I’ll deal with my mom when I have to.
“I was at the nurse’s office.” The truth is, I don’t trust myself to be around my classmates when I’m unable to control my energy. I know I could hurt people; I just don’t know how badly, and I don’t want to find out.
“Are you feeling okay now?” asks Lauren, looking concerned.
“I’m feeling fine now. Just a bit tired, that’s all.” I place my tray beside Hailey’s.
Our lunch table feels empty and oddly quiet today since Emmet and his friends aren’t here.
Hailey is sitting beside me while Lauren is sitting right in front of me, next to CeeCee and Georgina. CeeCee and Georgina are girlfriends of Emmet’s buddies.
“I was worried when you didn’t show up for history,” says Hailey. Hailey and I have a world history class first period. “Do you know that the new students are in our history class?”
“Oh, you’re so lucky!” exclaims Georgina.
“I know, right?” says CeeCee. “So, I heard the dark-haired boy’s name is Ruen and the blond’s name is Finley. Both of them are so hot. I swear, if any of them wants me, I’d leave Remy like yesterday.”
Remy is her boyfriend.
“Better not let Remy hear you say that,” says Lauren.
I feel that same energy I felt this morning suddenly spiking up again before Hailey snickers. “Well, I’m sorry to tell you, CeeCee, it looks like they are already unavailable.”
She is staring at the table in front of us. It’s the table where Luella and her friends usually sit.
Luella, the two new boys, and her best friend, Jesse, are carrying their trays to the table. Luella is staring up at the boys as if she can’t take her eyes off of them both, and they’re giving her all their attention.
Jesse is looking like a third, or rather the fourth, wheel, following them around like a lost puppy when none of them, not even Luella, is talking to her or even sparing her a glance.
They put their trays on the table and—instead of sitting on a chair—Luella sits on the lap of the one named Ruen. The dark-haired one. His bluer-than-the-sky eyes are staring into her green ones.
“I’m not feeling well again,” I tell my friends. “Excuse me.” I get up and rush out of the lunchroom.
***
What is wrong with me? Why am I so angry with them? ~I don’t even know those boys. So what if they’re flirting with Luella?~ ~Wait, is she seeing both of them?~
I’m in a cubicle in the washroom, leaning on the wall as angry sparks shoot out, not only through my fingertips but my entire body this time—hurting, scorching my skin. This has never happened before.
I hear some rustling sounds in another cubicle and a giggle that doesn’t sound very human-like. I bang my head against the wall behind me. God, I hate washrooms! But I can’t be near anyone or let anybody see me like this.
Lunchtime is going to be over soon, and I already missed a class this morning. I can’t miss another one, or they’ll call my parents right away.
What if I see them with Luella again? What am I going to do? I can’t keep running into the washroom every time that happens. What if I hurt somebody?
The bell rings, indicating that lunchtime is over. The sparks slowly stop torturing me, and I’m left feeling weak.
Suddenly, a thick, green puddle of liquid starts to spread on the blue tiles of the washroom from the other cubicle into mine. Tiny wisps of smoke rise out of it.
The smell of urine, ten times worse than the regular pee smell, invades the space and I gag. It almost reaches my shiny black shoes. No, no, no… I inch back while fumbling with the cubicle lock.
The giggling sounds louder and more unhinged—something must be wildly hilarious. I run out as soon as I manage to unlock the door.
***
“That’s coming along very beautifully, Melissa,” says my art teacher, Ms. Collins.
No, no, no…~it’s all wrong!~ “Thanks,” I tell her as I add a splash of perylene green to the faraway hills before they disappear behind the fog and the clouds.
“The colors of the flowers are so bright, making it look so exciting and bringing everything forward while the foggy hills in the background give it a dreamy feeling,” she continues. “Good job.”
She moves on to the next student, and Hailey peers at my painting from behind her canvas.
“Even if it’s not really my thing, I have to admit it looks great. You’re very talented, Mel. I wish I could walk right into that painting of yours,” says Hailey.
“No, the painting is awful again. It pales in comparison to the real thing. The place looks much better than this. Much, much better.”
I scowl at the painting. It frustrates me that I haven’t managed to capture the image or even a smidgen of the feeling that this place evokes in me.
“You mean this place exists?” asks Hailey.
Does it exist? I frown, thinking. I don’t know. All I know is that I yearn to be there—a meadow full of colors. Marigolds, lilacs, daisies, lavender, freesias, and sweet peas bloom bright and colorful.
The grass is vivid green—the greenest you’ve ever seen. The air smells so sweet, full of fragrances. There’s a lake with water so crystal clear, yet it seems bottomless.
There are mountains across the lake, but the clouds lie so low that the tops disappear behind them. Sometimes the fog gets so thick, the mountains disappear altogether.
Everything is heart-stoppingly beautiful; there are no words for it.
“Maybe in my dream,” I answer her, feeling very confused. Why am I so obsessed with this place? Have I been there before? Where is it?
Last week, I worked with pastel, drawing the same scene. The week before that, it was acrylic. The weeks leading to that, I made sketch after sketch of it. I was filled with frustration every time.
Today, I’m using watercolor. Maybe I’ll work on it using oil next time. Maybe I’ll be able to capture it one day. Maybe one day, I’ll stop feeling this crippling weakness, longing, emptiness…and stop feeling trapped.
***
I come back to a quiet house. My parents are away. Madison is staying over at her friend’s house. I don’t know where Luella’s gone to, but she isn’t home yet. Mrs. McEwan, our housekeeper and cook, is still not here.
Tired. I’m so tired and weak that I crawl all the way to the kitchen. Maybe I’ll just lie down on the kitchen floor till morning.