Playing Pretend

When I graduated college and landed a job as a personal assistant at Wolf Technologies, I didn’t think I’d still be there three years later.

My plan was to gain some experience and then move on to something that would really kickstart my career.

Wolf Technologies was just a small startup at first, and Brennan Wolf, the boss, was hands-on with everything.

His meticulous nature is what propelled his business to unimaginable heights, and I was right there with him as his PA.

In less than two years, we had to lease a skyscraper in the heart of the city.

As the business grew, Brennan leaned on me more and more. He couldn’t keep track of everything like he used to, so I became his extra pair of eyes.

I also became the one who made excuses to his family and the one who dealt with his one-night stands.

Brennan seemed emotionally distant, and while staying with Wolf Technologies was great for my career, it felt like a moral compromise.

Brennan and I were polar opposites. Family and relationships mattered to me, but they didn’t seem to matter to him.

Which is why I was puzzled as I sat in the plush leather seat of Brennan’s car, tears streaming down my face.

Just ten minutes ago, I was on the phone with a potential client when a personal call came in. Now, everything had changed.

My mom was gone. She was fine yesterday when we spoke, and now she was gone.

I tried to stifle a sob, but it came out as an unattractive snort that would have embarrassed me under any other circumstances.

Brennan, who had offered to drive me home, reached over and opened his glove box. He handed me a pack of travel wipes.

“For all the hearts you break,” I said, my tone more bitter than I intended.

“Something like that,” he replied softly. “Are you sure you want to go home? You can stay at my place tonight and fly out to your dad tomorrow.”

Even in my grief, I was surprised Brennan even suggested it. He was usually so guarded. I wouldn’t say he was heartless, but he rarely showed any emotion.

I looked at him, my brow furrowed. Brennan couldn’t see me judging him, but I was, and I felt guilty for it.

He was just trying to be kind, maybe because I was sitting in his car, crying my eyes out, but the thought was there, and that meant something to me.

“I’m okay,” I said, not meaning it at all—which I’m sure Brennan noticed, though he didn’t say anything. “I’ve booked a flight tonight.”

Brennan didn’t say anything else until we arrived at my building.

“Take all the time off you need. I’ll call a temp agency while you’re gone.”

“Thank you, B,” I whispered, unbuckling my seatbelt.

“Take care, G,” he responded. I looked at him. His brown eyes were filled with sympathy, a look I wasn’t used to seeing on my usually stoic boss.

I’d been with him since the early days of Wolf Technologies. I knew enough to know that I was the closest thing he had to a friend, and even that was a stretch.

I forced a small smile, my face still wet with tears, and got out of Brennan’s car. I walked to my building’s front door and unlocked it. When I turned back, Brennan was gone.

As soon as I was inside my apartment, the tears came flooding back.

I slid down against my door and cried so hard I was surprised my neighbors didn’t start banging on the wall like they did when I played music.

I felt alone. My heart felt heavy and distant, as if it was a million miles away. If only I could have spoken to her one more time.

In the car with Brennan, I’d been upset but not alone. I’d felt comfortable with him without the pretense of work, and that realization scared me.

Mom would have made this almost-friendship into something it wasn’t. She always thought Brennan and I were kidding ourselves. It wasn’t her fault she didn’t know him like I did.

They’d never met, and now they never would.

I pulled my knees up to my chest and hugged my legs, resting my head on them.

Part of me wanted to stay in my apartment forever. If I didn’t leave and catch that plane, I wouldn’t have to say goodbye. I wasn’t sure I could pull myself out of this slump.

I took out my phone. Brennan would only be a few blocks away. I knew he’d come back if I called. My thumb hovered over his number, and I almost hit call.

I sighed, turned off the phone, and lifted my head.

I had to be strong. My dad was going to need me to be.