My chest compacted, making breathing impossible, and my mark pulsed uncontrollably until my vision blurred, which panicked me because I didn’t want to stop looking at her. From what I’d seen, she’d been so pretty, all her thick, blonde hair swept up in a large bun to display the curve of her jaw, her pointed chin, the length of her graceful neck. Her eyes had been dark and soulful, and her nose pert and short.
And she’d been mine. My one and only. My mate and one true love.
I blinked rapidly until, ah…there. She came back into focus. Thank God.
My happily ever after rested on the shoulders of this very woman…who was quite obviously full with another man’s child.
Or was it?
Shit, this was just all wrong.
Which apparently she hadn’t.
Fuck!
Sweat coated my brow. Needles prickled my abdomen, making nausea swell up my throat. My vision dimmed again. I wasn’t sure how I remained upright.
But… Jesus Christ on the cross, the woman who was supposed to become the love of my life was already taken.
I turned to Allera frantically, seeking support, but she wasn’t looking at me; she was too busy smiling politely and answering a question the king had asked her.
She finally looked up at me. The pointed glare in her eyes told me to shape up and pay attention. We were here to align our kingdoms, not tear them apart by me stealing one of its royal women from whichever man expected a baby with her any day now.
I clenched my teeth, not at all pleased by Allera announcing to everyone that I was some weakling who couldn’t handle a bit of travel, but at the moment, any excuse to evacuate this room was welcome. If I couldn’t carry my one true love away and bed her right now, then fuck it, I had to flee before I strode up there and fell at her feet, bellowing about my rage and sorrow.
Goddamn. What was wrong with me?
I didn’t do shit like that.
I didn’t even know that woman.
Spinning to King Caulder, I blurted, “Would it be rude of me to ask to be shown to my chambers now?”
Allera gaped at me, and yep, she definitely wanted to strangle me. But both the king and Prince Brentley chuckled politely at my request.
“Not at all, Prince Urban. I’ll have one of my pages show you to your quarters forthwith.” After motioning a servant forward, the king bowed slightly to Allera. “And you too, as well, Princess. For your comfort, we’ve set up your rooms directly across from each other.”
“Oh, thank you. That is most kind. You have no idea how much we appreciate it.”
Allera’s gushing made me roll my eyes.
Sir Soren caught the move and narrowed his gaze scornfully. I glared right back, no longer in the mood to be diplomatically pleasant.
Allera took my arm and yanked me around so we could follow some tiny man with long, spindly hands down dizzying passages, up a wide staircase, and down more lavish hallways until he paused and turned to us, splaying out his enormous hands to direct each of us to our respective rooms.
Neither Allera nor I had spoken a single word on the entire walk. We shared a telling glance before we both turned away and entered two different chambers.
I was barely inside mine ten seconds before a knock fell on my door and she tore inside.
“What?” I growled at her, not ready to discuss…well, anything.
When she only shook her head, I cursed under my breath and began to pace the floor.
She stepped toward me. “Talk to me, Urban.”
Life sucked.
I didn’t want to be on this ride any longer.
“About anything,” she said patiently. “Just… Talk it out.”
I snorted and sent her a dismissive glance. But she looked so worried and understanding, I growled another curse and swiped a hand through my hair.
I stared at her stupidly with no idea what to say, because damn, I wasn’t even sure which woman my one true love had been. I’d locked my sights on her and hadn’t paid attention to the other sister who’d been next to her at all.
“We’ll be executed,” she went on, clutching her throat. “Both of us. Probably beheaded. Oh God.”
I rolled my eyes over her dramatics. “And blast it,” I continued, talking over her. “I don’t know which sister it chose. So shut up about the queen already.”
“Oh.” Sounding disappointed, Allera’s shoulders fell. “Well, what color was she wearing?”
My legs started to wobble, my knees no longer wanted to hold me. I sat on the edge of the bed and hung my hands between my knees as I lowered my head, defeated.
“Blue,” I admitted quietly. “She wore blue. She was the one who’s… pregnant.”
Allera breathed out a long, sad sigh and sat beside me.
When she said nothing, I finally demanded in a hoarse voice, “Well? Is my one true love the queen or not?”
“No,” Allera answered.
I’d slaughter him.
Allera rolled her eyes. “Oh, don’t act jealous.”
“I know,” Allera said quietly and patted my back. “It doesn’t seem possible, especially when it first happens. But this is exactly how it progresses for all of us.”
I stared at her, not sure how Allera made it through each day without her one true love.
She touched the side of her eye where her mark had faded. “I’m sure the pull from the mark is why the tattoo fades after one dies. The pain with it there would probably be more than we could bear. The misery’s quite intense without it, anyway. I’m almost glad it’s gone.” Except, I could tell she wasn’t glad at all. She wanted her mark back. She wanted her one true love back.
I gently touched the side of her eye, mourning with her. “I’m sorry,” I said. “For all you’ve suffered.”
Guilt and agony consumed me.
This was my fault. If only I’d just—
She smiled sadly and wrapped her fingers around my wrist, accepting my sympathy.
“Will it always itch so much?” I asked. “When she’s near?”
I could still feel my mate’s presence in the castle, but it wasn’t as strong as it had been while we’d been in the Throne Room together.
I nodded, glad to hear that, though I don’t know why I should be glad. I shouldn’t care, and yet I wanted to be able to sense her presence and know she was out there, that she was alive and well. I liked realizing I could always locate her if I needed to. It provided a security that eased something restless in my soul… something that hadn’t even existed until I’d entered the Iron Castle.
“Any more questions?” Allera asked.
I turned to her. “Yeah.” I gave a self-derisive grin. “What am I going to do about this? I can’t exactly claim her since she’s already married.”
I couldn’t do nothing. My one true love… she was in this very palace.
I shook my head. “Yeah, but—”
“She doesn’t know that,” Allera murmured. I turned to her, and her eyes filled with sympathy. “Think about what’s best for our kingdom, Brother. You can only cause mayhem by acting on this. I guarantee you they don’t understand our marks. They could kick us out of Donnelly, sever our alliance—hell, they might even kill us.”
I almost didn’t care. The itching urge to find her this second still roared through me. Nothing mattered but being by her side, worshipping her, living my life to provide her with everything she ever needed or wanted.
I nodded. “If she’s not happy with the life she has, then yes, I do. I’ll burn down the whole fucking realm around us to make her content.”
Allera smiled and clasped my arm. “It’s okay. Everything’s intense and overwhelming when you first see your one true love. Truth be told, I was so dazzled by Jazon, I bedded him about thirty seconds after we met.”
Allera laughed and tugged my hands from my ears. “I’m just saying, you go a bit crazy at first sight.” Then she sent me an admiring glance. “You actually surprised me with how well you held it together. You have impressive decorum, Brother.”
It certainly didn’t feel that way. To me, I felt utterly unhinged.
“You are so not helping,” I muttered. “In fact, you should leave now. Your uncertainty has done nothing but—”
“No.” Her voice was firm as she narrowed her eyes. “You’re not going to seek her out.”
I bared my teeth in a snarl. “Of course I’m going to seek her out. I have to know if she’s okay.” I had to know what she was like. Was she easygoing with a quick smile and quicker wit? Closed-off and intense? Airheaded and whiny? Pretentious and vain?
The not-knowing was driving me crazy.
But most importantly, I had to touch her. Kiss her. Get inside her. My body was still screaming at me over how imperative that was.
I winced. Hurting her in any way would slaughter me. Almost as much as it slaughtered me to think of her carrying around someone else’s infant.
I surged up off the bed and began to pace the room once more. “You don’t understand.”
I shook my head, not satisfied with that. “I want to measure her level of contentment for myself.”
“I’m aware of that, my sweet little brother. But you know as well as I do how unwise that is. You should stay away from her.”
I turned away moodily, not wanting to hear that suggestion. “Stop calling me little. I haven’t been smaller than you since I was twelve.”
Allera chuckled even as she hugged me from behind, soaking my shirt with her silent tears. “I know how difficult this is for you.”
Dammit. Her tears were what undid me. Agony roared through my chest. Covering her hand with mine, I lifted my face toward the ceiling and squeezed my eyes closed.
“It’s the hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
“But you’ll stay away, right?” Letting go of me so she could force me around to face her, she sent me a fond smile. “Tell me you’ll trust me to get the information you want. It’s in the best interest of all of us that you do nothing.”
My jaw hardened, but after a moment, I turned away and nodded. “I’ll stand aside,” I said. “For now.”
“Thank you.” Allera rose onto her tiptoes and kissed my cheek. “I won’t let you down, I promise. Besides.” She flashed me a mischievous grin. “This will help me keep my mind off the fact I’m going to be marrying someone who isn’t Jazon soon.”
Watching Allera walk to the door, I waited until she opened it before I said her name.
She glanced back with lifted eyebrows.
“I wasn’t paying attention during the introduction,” I admitted. “Did she… I mean, did anyone announce what her name was?”
Allera smiled. “Yes. The queen’s name is Yasmin. And her sister is Lady Vienne.”
“Vienne,” I whispered as Allera left, shutting the door behind her. My heart thudded hard against my rib cage.
My one true love was called Vienne.
