Hyun Ji
HUNTER
As soon as Jeremy finished the words, Drew was gone. I’d never seen him run that fast, didn’t know he even could.
I mentally cursed Jeremy as I passed him at the door. I ran to catch up to Drew so I could say what I wanted to say before he got a chance to see Elliot off. I needed him to hear me apologize, and I needed to do it before I lost my courage.
By the time I exited the pack house, however, Drew had already reached Elliot at his car.
Damn, he’s fast, I thought. ~When he wants to be.~ The familiar warmth of anger bubbled in my blood. Drew had never run this fast for the pack, but he’d sure do it for his lover. Did he even care about being a beta at all? Did he have no sense of duty to his family?
I walked closer, unable to not watch their goodbye.
I’d known when Elliot was leaving, and I’d hoped my fight with Drew would have lasted until he was gone, which was why I asked my dad to have us duel. But when I’d seen Elliot packing his car and looking around for Drew, I knew he’d never leave without saying goodbye.
I hadn’t meant to hurt Drew so badly, but by the way he’d run, you’d never have known he’d just had a major skull injury.
I stood behind the edge of a building to watch them. Drew was crying now and Elliot was comforting him, carrying and holding him like a baby against his chest. My heart tightened, and despite the sadness of the scene, my anger simmered further.
Drew had never cried for me. He’d never shown any strong emotion toward me besides fear.
Can you blame him? that pesky voice in my mind said.
But it was right. I’d been nothing but a terror to Drew, and I doubted I’d ever see him look at me with love in his eyes. My heart dropped at the sudden misery this thought caused me.
Wait, do I want Drew to love me? I pulled back around the edge of the building so I could lean against it and ponder this question.
Before I could dive too deeply into these new, confusing thoughts, Beta David’s and Jeremy’s voices brought me back to my snooping.
The dads tried to get in hugs of their own with Elliot, but Drew refused to release him, so they just said goodbye from the curb.
“I’ll wait for you,” Drew said as Elliot finally unwrapped Drew’s legs from around his waist, setting him on the ground. “Then, the day you come back, we can finally be mates. Officially.” Drew sniffed and wiped his nose as he took a step back, but the tears still fell.
Elliot opened the door of his car and said to Drew, “Be strong.” Then, his eyes flashed to mine for a moment before going back to Drew’s. “Fight back.”
I gripped the edge of the building, my nails chipping against the brick. Who does this guy think he is? The only person who should have control over Drew is me. He’s my~ beta. And ~I’m~ his alpha.~ ~I’m the one he should look at with those eyes. I’m the one he should love.~
Elliot pulled away and drove off. Jeremy and Beta David walked away. And Drew stood on the curb, crying. I walked up to him.
“I’ll wait for you,” he whispered to the car in the distance.
“You’re infuriating, you know that?” I said.
His back straightened and a hand came up to wipe his nose. He sniffed once more and turned to me. “And why is that?” His blue irises stood out all the more against the now red whites of his eyes.
“Because you’re crying like a bitch. It’s not like he’s gone forever. He’ll be back.”
Drew shook his head and shoved past me as he walked away.
“Hey!” I followed after him. “I wasn’t finished talking to you back there, you know. In the clinic.” I reached out to grab his shoulder. “I wanted to apo—”
“You know what?” Drew spun around. “I’m so done with you. I don’t care what you want to say. I don’t ever want you to speak to me again!”
I stumbled back at his sudden stop, and again by his words.
“You say you want me to fight back? Fine. But I’ll fight the way I know how. With words. I’ll stop protecting you.” He turned and continued walking. “I’ll tell everyone what a monster you are. I’ll have you stripped of your birthright for all the evil shit you’ve done to me over the years.”
My shock gave way to fear as I followed him. People would believe him if he told, and I knew my dad would bow to pack pressure to unname me as his heir. I’d be a failure, an outcast. I might even be exiled. My fear made room for anger.
“Then we’ll see who’s crying.” Drew stopped and spun around again, pointing a finger at me. “And by the way, I was crying because the man I love is leaving for three years. But you wouldn’t know anything about that, would you?” He shook his head.
I knew better than to answer that. However, I wasn’t sure what I’d have said if the question hadn’t been rhetorical. I wasn’t even sure if my answer now would have been the same as just a few minutes ago. My feelings were all mixed up inside, and I needed time to think.
“You’ve never been in love, so you wouldn’t understand what I’m feeling right now.” He turned to walk away again, saying, “Hell, I bet you’re not even capable of feeling love. Monsters don’t feel love.”
That was too far. “You don’t know anything about me,” I said, grabbing his arm and forcing him to turn around. His eyes finally gave me an emotion other than fear, and the rage in them froze me in my place.
“I know all that I need to. Your pleasure comes from the pain you inflict on me.” He cocked his head. “And why is that? Why me? You say it’s because I’m weak, but I say it’s because you’re jealous. Because you don’t want me to be with Elliot.”
I couldn’t think fast enough for a response, and he took that as a confirmation.
A confident smile spread across his face. “That’s it, isn’t it? You’re ga—”
I punched him hard in the mouth to keep him from saying that word, from accusing me of being like him.
He fell to the ground, his lip split open and bleeding, but his smile remained. He looked at me with new eyes. The fear and anger were gone, replaced by a look I’d never seen directed at me before.
Does he pity me?
Blind rage took over, and I saw the next few moments as a spectator outside my body.
I jumped on top of Drew and screamed, then my fists rained down with each word I said. “I. Am. Not. A. Dick. Lover!”
Drew couldn’t fight back; I was straddling his chest and arms. When my punches stopped, his face was bruised and bloody. But my rage wasn’t done. I noticed the training pool not three feet away. I got up and dragged him to its edge.
“Why do you make me hurt you?” I pushed his head under the water then pulled it back out.
He gasped.
“Can’t you see I’m trying to help you?” I pushed then pulled again.
He coughed.
“I need you to be strong.” And again.
He choked on the water.
“I need you to be with me forever.” Again.
He spit up water.
“I need you, Drew.” I pushed then held his head under the water.
He stopped moving.
“You’re fucking killing him! Get away from him!” Henry said, helping Charles rip me away from Drew.
Henry ran to Drew, pulling his head out of the water and putting him on his back beside the pool. He tapped Drew’s cheek, but Drew didn’t open his eyes.
Charles was still holding my arms behind me as the last of my anger came out in tears. I couldn’t look away from Drew’s small limp body.
What have I done?
Henry placed his ear by Drew’s nose. “He’s not breathing.” He looked at us in a panic, eyes wide, then began to perform CPR on Drew.
As soon as Henry placed his lips against Drew’s, I came back into my body, had control of it again, and ripped out of Charles’s grasp, pushing Henry away from Drew and performing the CPR myself. I couldn’t let Henry suffer if I’d already killed Drew.
I switched between breaths and chest compressions for what felt like an eternity, praying that the Goddess would bring him back to me. Then, he jolted and coughed up water. Henry rushed to his side and turned him so the water could flow out, and I leaned back.
“Are you okay? Drew, can you hear me?” Henry asked as he gripped Drew’s shoulder.
Drew struggled to breathe, so he only nodded, then he sat up with Henry’s help. “I’m fine,” he said in a raspy voice. “It was an accident.”
“Bullshit! We saw what happened!” Henry shot me a look that told me our friendship was forever over. “He tried to kill you.”
Panic rose with the bile in my stomach. I shook my head. “No, I—”
Drew raised a hand to cut off my argument. “It’s fine.” He moved to stand, Henry helped him, and I stood last.
“Come on. Charles and I will take you to Jeremy,” Henry said.
Charles spoke up to agree, his eyes still wide and face still frozen in shock.
“No,” Drew said, shrugging Henry’s hand off his shoulder. “I just want to go home.”
“Drew, you were flatlined for a good minute, maybe two. We should at least check that your brain’s all right.” Henry looked to Charles for support.
“Yeah, man. Just a quick check,” was Charles’s contribution.
Drew looked Henry in the eyes, then Charles, then me. There was nothing left in them, pure indifference; his emotional tank was empty. He sighed. “I just want to go.” He wrapped his arms around his thin body, shivered, and began to walk away.
My hands moved to take off the sweater I was wearing, but Henry stopped me. He motioned for Charles to go with Drew, watched them walk off, and when they were a few paces away, he turned to me, his look containing all the vitriol I’d known him to have.
He didn’t speak for a moment, just breathed deeply until his trembling lessened and fists unclenched. “You are a poor excuse for an alpha,” he said through gritted teeth.
I hung my head. He was right.
“Leave Drew, Charles, and me alone. We’re done with you.”
I kept my head low until the sounds of their footsteps were out of earshot, one thought repeating in my mind.
I killed him.