Husband in Training
Auteur·e
Christine Rimmer
Lectures
18,9K
Chapitres
18
Chapter 1
In the middle of a cold Saturday night in late February, Jenny Brown sat on the couch in her family room, sipping a glass of Chenin Blanc, thumbing through the photo albums she usually never allowed herself to look at, trying to remember...
Everything.
The way he’d tilt his head when he was deep in thought. The light in his eyes when he looked at her. His smile: so sweet, a little goofy. The way he would laugh at a joke, just throwing his head back and braying out his pleasure, his Adam’s apple bobbing up and down on his long, tanned throat. His hands, so long and slender. Like the rest of him. Long and slender.
And the smell of him. Like...
Jenny looked up from the album. She stared off in the direction of the vertical blinds, which were drawn shut now, over the glass door that led out to the backyard. She closed her eyes, breathed in through her nose.
The smell of him. Like...
But nothing came. She couldn’t remember. Couldn’t call up that special, particular scent that had been his alone. Oh, she could put words to it. It had been somewhat sharp, in a clean way. Like a fresh-cut Christmas tree, when you bring it in that first day, and stand it up in the house. Yes, clean and sharp as the smell of pine. And a little bit sweet, like honey and sunshine all mixed up together.
But those were just words. Words Jenny remembered, from all the times before, when she had called up the scent of him and it had come to her, stunning and hurtful and achingly real.
Now, it wouldn’t come. Only words would come.
The years had done what years do: they had stolen the scent of him away from her.
Jenny slowly brought the wine to her lips. She took a sip, swallowed, set the glass on the oak coffee table in front of her, to the left of the stack of photo albums. She looked down at the open album in her lap. At Andrew and her younger self, arms around each other, standing under a basketball hoop over at Oki Park.
Grinning. Both of them grinning. Neither of them knowing what a hideous surprise life had in store.
She touched his face, in the photograph. “Oh, Andrew—”
As she said his name, the front doorbell chimed.
Jenny stiffened. Who in the world...? It was so late. She glanced at her watch. Past two.
Carefully she closed the album and set it on top of the stack on the coffee table. Then she stood, went up the two steps to the dining area and through the open doorway to her small kitchen. From there, she could peek through the blinds that covered the window over the sink and see who had decided to ring her doorbell so late at night.
It was Nick DeSalvo, Andrew’s best friend since both of them were little boys, standing there with his big shoulders hunched against the cold and his hands stuffed in his pockets. He was looking down. But he must have heard the blinds rattle against the window, because his dark head came up and he saw her. “Can I come in?” He more mouthed the words than said them.
She dropped the blind and hurried out of the kitchen, back through the dining area and into the small foyer next to the formal living room that she rarely used. She fiddled with the chain and dead bolt, then pulled the door open.
“Nick. What is it? Are you all right?”
He didn’t answer. He appeared to be studying the toes of the expensive-looking boots he wore.
Jenny wrapped her arms around herself, shivering a little in her thin leggings and stocking feet. “Nick?”
At last, he spoke. “Sasha left me,” he said to his boots. “She told me last week that she loved me. Yesterday, we had a big fight. And then today, when I got home, I found this....” He looked up then, dark eyes beneath heavy black brows brooding and uncharacteristically somber. “Here. Have a look.” He stuck out a rumpled square of paper.
Jenny took the paper. By the porch light she read, “It’s over, Nick. Don’t try to contact me again. Goodbye.” She handed the note back to him. “What? What’s over?”
Nick sighed heavily and shook his head. “It was on my pillow. She left it on my pillow, along with the key I gave her, so she could get in the house anytime she wanted to.” He tucked the note into a pocket.
Jenny wrapped her arms around herself again and watched her own breath plume in the icy air, waiting for him to say more. But Nick only stared at her, mute appeal in his eyes. “Nick. Why don’t you come on in?”
He smiled then—that real guy’s guy smile of his, the one that drove all the women crazy. “Hey. I thought you’d never ask.”
Jenny reached out, took hold of his big, muscular arm and pulled him over the threshold. He started right for the family room as she took a minute to lock things up again.
He was already parked on one end of the couch when she caught up with him short seconds later. She hovered a few feet away, mindful to take care of her hostess duties before she herself sat down. “Come on. Take off your coat.”
He shrugged out of it, rose to his feet for a moment and gave it a toss. It landed on the armchair in the corner, by the TV. Nick dropped back to the couch.
“Do you want a drink or something?”
Nick skimmed both blunt-fingered hands back over the crown of his head. The gesture didn’t do a thing to his hair. It was thick and black, shot prematurely with glints of silver. He always kept it short enough that neither a comb nor his own raking hands could have much effect on it.
She offered again, “Hey. A drink. Yes or no?”
He seemed to shake himself. “Uh-uh. I tried that. It didn’t help.”
Jenny went ahead and dropped to the other end of the couch. “Okay, then talk to me. Tell me all about this woman named Sasha.”
He glanced around, frowning. “Polly’s in bed, huh?”
Jenny gathered her legs up to the side and pulled the hem of her huge sweatshirt over her knees. “Nick. It’s two in the morning.”
For a moment, he looked disappointed; he adored Jenny’s thirteen-year-old daughter. But then he shrugged. “Right. Two a.m. A kid should be in bed at two a.m.”
“Exactly.”
“Hell, Jen. I know I shouldn’t have bothered you. But after I went out and tried to get drunk, I realized I needed a friend to talk to.”
“It’s okay.”
“Besides, if I didn’t come here, I’d have to go home. And you know what?”
“What?”
“I realized something else tonight. I hate my house.”
Jenny made a sympathetic sound. Nick’s house was new and big and expensive. He’d had it built by his own construction company. and he’d hired a big-name interior decorator to furnish it for him. Thus, it was an interior decorator’s idea of where a successful bachelor ought to live, a testament to the rags-to-riches success of Nick DeSalvo, general contractor turned real estate developer. Five thousand square feet of steel and glass and pricey modular furniture. In Jenny’s opinion, a person would find more comfort on a slab at the morgue.
A slab at the morgue.
A grim analogy, but fitting, considering the date.
Nick’s dark gaze made a pass over her, taking in her leggings and faded CSUS sweatshirt. “Hey. You weren’t in bed, were you?” He glanced around a little, spotted the stack of photo albums on the coffee table, next to the nearly empty glass of wine. He understood then. “Andy, huh?”
Jenny forced a wobbly smile. “Four years to the day—as of five hours from now.”
February 23, early in the morning. Because of those jelly doughnuts he loved. He’d gotten up at 6:50 and told Jenny to get the coffee on. He wanted jelly doughnuts and he was running over to the doughnut shop on Folsom to pick up a half dozen. He would share them with Polly, since jelly-filled were her favorite kind, too. But what kind did Jenny want?
Jenny had yawned and stretched, then murmured, “Chocolate-covered old-fashioned.”
He bent over her. One last kiss. “Chocolate-covered old-fashioned, it is.” And he was gone.
Forever.
Down the couch, Nick held out his big arms. “C’mere.” With a little self-pitying sigh, Jenny slid over to him. He enfolded her in a hug. It felt good, to rest against him, to hear the strong, steady beat of a friend’s heart.
“I was thinking about him tonight, too,” Nick whispered against her hair.
She snuggled a little closer, indulging herself. Nick had such strong arms, such a broad, deep chest. She always felt safe whenever he hugged her. “Really?”
“Uh-huh. I still miss him.” He rubbed her gently on the back. “And I shouldn’t have showed up here. I should have left you alone.”
“That’s not true.” She gave up the comfort of his arms, straightening from his embrace and resolutely retreating to her own side of the sofa. “What’s a friend for, if you can’t come knocking on her door when you need her? And besides, I think I was getting kind of maudlin, sitting here all alone, looking at old pictures, feeling sorry for myself.” She made a little show of getting comfortable all over again, drawing up her legs and tugging her sweatshirt hem over her knees. “Okay. Let’s talk about you.”
“Jenny—”
“No.” His hand lay along the sofa back, very near her own. She gave it a motherly pat. “I mean it. Tell me about this Sasha person.”
Those thick brows got a little closer together as he frowned in obvious puzzlement. “Didn’t you meet her? I thought you met her.”
“I don’t think so. How long have you known her?”
“Three weeks.”
“Uh-uh. We haven’t seen you since about a month ago.”
“Come on. It can’t have been that long.”
“Yes, it has. It was the end of January. Remember, you took Polly to that basketball game in San Francisco?”
“Oh. Right.” He grunted. “The Bulls played the Warriors. The Bulls. Michael Jordan. Scottie Pippen. I mean, these are the giants of the game. And how many more years have they got, do you think? Any kid who gets a chance to see them in the flesh is one lucky kid. But Polly, she just kept yawning through the whole damn game. Andy’s kid. And she yawned through a Bulls game.”
Gently Jenny reminded him, “Polly has...other interests.”
“Yeah, right. Emily Dickerson, I heard all about her.”
“It’s Dickinson. Emily Dickinson.”
“Whatever.”
“And, as I said, we never got a chance to meet this Sasha.”
He let out a long, heartfelt sigh. “Well. Sasha was perfect.”
There was still a little wine left in Jenny’s glass. She picked it up and finished it off. “Perfect for what?” She set her glass back on the coffee table.
“For me. For my wife.”
Jenny’s mouth dropped open in pure amazement. “Your wife? Since when do you want a wife?”
Nick shifted on the couch, facing front now, planting his booted feet apart, hunching over and resting his arms on his thighs. “Since...lately. Since I’ve been thinking that something is missing.” He shot her a sideways glance. “And you don’t have to look at me like that.”
“Well, but, Nick...”
“‘But, Nick’ what?” His strong, square jaw had jutted out even farther, in pure defensiveness.
“Well, I mean...”
“What?”
She still didn’t answer. She was too busy recalling a few remarks Nick had made over the years in regard to women and matrimony. Things like, “Why buy a cow when there’s so much cream around?” and “If I wanted to be tied down, I’d hire one of those sweeties in black leather with a whip.”
“I want to get married, damn it.” Now Nick sounded downright defiant. He was sitting up straight and glowering at her.
She put up both hands. “Okay, okay. So you want to get married. To Sasha...”
“Overfield. Sasha Overfield.”
“Why to Sasha Overfield?”
“Because Sasha’s the woman I’ve been waiting for all my life.” He slumped back on the couch and stared morosely down at his spread knees. “I went to the damn opera with her, Jenny. That’s how serious I was.”
“Wow. I am impressed.”
He turned to look at her. “I may be a lunkhead, but I know sarcasm when I hear it.”
“Wait a minute. Did I call you a lunkhead?”
“No, you were sarcastic. Sasha’s the one who called me a lunkhead—a lunkhead in a hard hat is how she put it.”
“But why would she call you a lunkhead? Didn’t you say that she said she loved you?”
“She did. And ‘lunkhead’ is not a word a woman like Sasha would normally use. But she was frustrated. Because she doesn’t want to love me.”
“Why not?”
“Because she wants to get married.”
“That’s a problem? You just said you want to get married.”
“Right. We both want to get married. But she thinks I’d make a lousy husband. She says I’m insensitive. That I would never be there for her in the tough times, since I’m not in touch with my inner child or my feminine self. That I have no romance in my soul. She also said that we have no common interests, so as soon as the hot sex wears off, we’ll end up in the divorce courts.”
Jenny rejected the idea of exploring the issue of hot sex. She asked, briskly, “Aside from the opera, what are Sasha’s interests?”
“Huh?”
“Her interests, Nick. What are her favorite things? What activities does she enjoy?”
“Well.” He slumped deeper into the couch cushions as he pondered the question. Finally he said, “She’s got a cat. A really fat one that she’s crazy about. And her apartment is full of books. She’s a reader, you know?” He glanced across the room at the two big, full bookcases that flanked the sliding glass door. “She’s like you and Polly that way. Also, she’s big on art and nutcases.”
Jenny resolutely did not roll her eyes. “Art and nutcases?”
“She’s studying to be what they call an art therapist. An art therapist has people look at paintings and draw things to work out their problems.”
This is a match made in hell, Jenny thought. Right up there with Eleanora Mandeath, the feminist performance artist he’d dated for about a month. And Betsy Faith, the manic-depressive flugel player from some coal mining town in England. Nick and Betsy had been an item for about three weeks.
“How, exactly, did you meet Sasha?”
He glanced away, muttered, “The Nine-Seventeen Club,” and then looked back at her, as if daring her to disapprove of the fact that he’d met his true love at one of Sacramento’s most popular singles’ bars, the kind of place where, if one did find true love, it rarely lasted longer than one night.
Nick shook his head. “I know, I know. That place is a meat market. But Sasha was lonely. And I was lonely, too. And we found each other.” He hung his head again. “And now I’ve lost her.”
Jenny had serious doubts about all this. But her friend looked so pitiful. She murmured with real sympathy, “Oh, Nick. I’m so sorry.”
He let out a low, sad, moany sound.
She decided they should try to look on the bright side. “Come on. You’ll find someone else. You always do.”
He lifted his hanging head and met her eyes. “No. That’s not the point. I don’t just want someone else.”
“Well, of course you don’t, but—”
He didn’t let her finish. Jumping to his feet, he loomed over her. “I pulled myself up from nothing, Jen. And now I’m what they call a success. But it’s kind of empty, you know? The single life just ain’t what it used to be for me.”
She stared up at him and he stared back, expectantly. As if he was waiting for her to comment. When she didn’t, he fervently declared, “I want a wife, I admit it.” He turned, took a few steps toward the patio doors and then spun back to face her. “I want a wife and kids.” He paused, raised both arms and then dropped them to his sides.
Jenny tugged her sweatshirt farther over her knees and said the only thing that came to her. “Well, okay, then.”
“No,” he argued. “No, Jen. It’s not okay. Not okay at all. Hell, Jen. Don’t you get it? She has to be the right kind of wife. Sensitive. Smart. Well educated. In one word—Sasha. She has to be Sasha.”
“Oh. I see.”
“Sasha.” He said the name again, with great passion. And then he started pacing back and forth across the section of carpet in front of the coffee table. “Jen, she’s the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. And tonight, after I gave up trying to get drunk, I started thinking. I mean really thinking.” He paused and turned to Jenny again.
She could see that he expected her to say something encouraging. So she obliged. “Good for you.”
He nodded. “I thought about how I hate my house and I thought how I needed to talk to you. And I also decided that I have to change. I have to...get sensitive. Get romantic. Get to be the kind of man Sasha will be proud to say yes to. You hear what I’m saying, Jen? Do you understand what I’m trying to tell you?”
“Certainly. I do understand. But Nick...”
“What?” He strode back to his end of the couch again and dropped down. “Say it. Go ahead.”
“Well, you...can’t be someone you’re not.”
The fervent gleam faded from his eyes. Now he really looked wounded. “So you think I’m an insensitive, hard-hatted lunkhead, too, huh?”
“Oh, stop it.” She waved a hand at him. “Of course I don’t think that, not at all. I only meant that I really can’t see you settled down permanently with the woman you just described. But I know you have a good heart. And you’ve been absolutely wonderful to me and Polly.” And he had been. More than wonderful. He had been the kind of friend few women are lucky enough to find, right there at her side through Andrew’s funeral, and the trial that had put Andrew’s killer behind bars for the rest of his life. And he hadn’t stopped there. Since then, he was always there whenever she needed him. He was the one Jenny called first when the hot-water heater broke and made the garage into a minilake, the one who would come right over if her stove or her garbage disposal went on the fritz. The one who took Polly to basketball games she didn’t want to go to, because he felt it was important that Andrew’s daughter learn to appreciate the things her father had loved.
Nick was watching her. He must have known the direction of her thoughts, because a way-too-charming grin was spreading slowly across his face. “So. You owe me. Right?”
She knew then that he was up to something. He hadn’t come to her house at two a.m. just to cry on her shoulder. “I know that grin.” She gathered her legs in closer, shrank back against her arm of the couch. “And I don’t like it.”
He slid his arm onto the back of the couch and moved in closer, hemming her in. “I just figured out how you can pay me back.”
“Nick. I said I don’t like this.”
He made a pouty face. “Don’t you want to pay me back?”
“Well, of course. You know I’d do just about anything for you, but—”
“Anything?” The black eyebrows rose and the dark eyes gleamed.
Looking at him, Jenny felt such warmth, such abiding affection—and she knew he was after something every bit as impossible as Sasha, the book-loving art therapist with the fat cat. “Nick, come on.”
“Listen. Just listen. You haven’t even let me say what it is yet.”
“Oh, Nick.”
“Don’t Oh, Nick me. Just listen. Just give me a chance.” He jumped to his feet again, stuck his hands into his pockets, pulled them out and gestured widely, with a sweep of both hands. “I know what I need, Jen. I know what’s required. And I know you’re the one to do it. I mean, you’re my friend, so you know all about me. You’re going to know right away the areas where I need the most work. And you’re a woman, so you’re going to be an expert in what I need to learn. And on top of all that, you’re a teacher. That is your job. You work with fourth-graders, all day long, pounding into their pointy little heads whatever fourth-graders are supposed to know. I guess what I’m saying is, if you can teach fourth-graders, then you can teach me.”
“Teach you what?”
And he told her. “How to be sensitive and understanding. How to really relate to a woman. How to get in touch with my feminine side and my inner child. How to—”
She was shaking her head. “Nick. No.”
But he was nodding. “Jen. Yes. That’s what I want from you. That’s how you can pay me back. Because I’ve figured out what’s wrong with me. I need to be trained.”
