LILAC Sisterhood 4: A Spanish Souvenir

Quirky, different, and off-putting are the three main things I hear about my personality. It’s not ideal, but I can’t say that I’ve done much to change those perceptions over the years. I grew up as the only child to two super controlling parents, and I sort of just let it happen.

I was never like other people my age; I’ve always felt behind. My parents made it hard to learn how to socialize. I wasn’t allowed to watch modern television or go to school when I was young.

Mother kept me in her office and homeschooled me until I became a teen and fought for my chance to go to school. Father told Mother it was time to let me go, so I went into the belly of the beast for my first time at fifteen. School is scary enough when you have basic skills, but I had none.

Before then, I learned how to talk and socialize while watching period dramas with my mother. Let’s just say that talking like I belong with Mr. Darcy didn’t go over very well with the kids when I went to high school. It took me a few months to figure out where I stood.

When you’re a child, you’re blissfully unaware of just how strange you are. Sometimes, I wish it was still like that. I don’t think I realized how unorthodox my upbringing truly was until I attended college. I had a really hard time adjusting and even sought out the help of a therapist.

I’ve got a good sense of who I am now and why I am the way I am, but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to work on myself. Now that I’m an adult, I read tons of modern books and watch television. I have my own home and a lot more control over my life than I did when I was a child.

I even feel a bit better socializing now, especially in business situations. After college, I came to work for the family business, Levine Souvenirs. I’ve always loved what my parents do. They put a lot of emphasis on family and creating memories, and it is reflected in all of our company policies.

They’re selling a dream that I want, and the family business is all I’ve ever known. The job provides me with a nice lifestyle while I still have time to work on myself and make moves for my future. When the business grew, my parents told me to hire an executive assistant.

You’d think I’d be nervous, but I knew that the only person I wanted to work with was Rhea. The only real good friend I’ve ever had is Rhea Lawson. She lived down the street from me and invited me to play at her house when we were kids.

My mother allowed it because she could see us playing through the window to make sure that we weren’t doing anything that crossed her lines. No TV or video games were allowed, but we played tag, caught butterflies, and colored with sidewalk chalk. Luckily, Rhea had a degree in business, so after I argued for a fair salary for her, she came to work with me.

Rhea understands me because she is an outcast in her own way. She is the youngest of three kids, and her older siblings have always doted on her. Of course, she is gorgeous, and she knows how to talk to people, but she has struggled with her heritage because her mother is Middle Eastern and married a blond-haired, blue-eyed white man.

That used to be a much bigger deal in society than it is now, so she seems to be finding her way in life, at least a lot better than I am. Last year, I was promoted, and now I am just one step below my parents. Rhea got promoted with me because I refused to work with anyone else, and she really deserved the pay bump.

Now, this morning, my parents have called me into another meeting, and I can only imagine what this is about. I keep trying to tell myself they’re my parents and I shouldn’t be scared or intimidated, but I am terrified. My rigid upbringing has made them expect way too much out of me.

They tried to mold me into something that I can never be. It’s just not achievable. Without even realizing it, I find myself pacing the small space in front of my desk. This can’t keep happening. I need to stand my ground and stop letting my parents control me.

“Calah, are you okay?” Rhea asks, looking up at me from her desk chair across the room. Her light-brown eyes look warm and comforting.

“Oh, just peachy, my dear. I’m a bit lost in thought,” I fib as I force myself to stop my endless pacing.

“It’s time to leave for your meeting,” she reminds me with a smile. “Want me to come with you to take notes?”

“No, it’s all right. I’m going on a mission to stand up to them,” I say, because once I’ve said it out loud, I feel like I’m more likely to follow through.

“Well, good luck. You know I’m here for you,” she says, smiling.

Her smile is genuine and supportive. Rhea is adorable. She’s so petite and bubbly that she instantly makes me feel better. It’s hard to feel stressed with her around, because I know she has my back.

“Thank you, Rhea.”

After gathering my things, I take a deep breath and walk down the long hallway to my parents’ office. This is the longest hallway in the world. Figuring out everything with my therapist has made me resent my parents.

I can’t help feeling like I’m marching to my doom. Sure, it’s cute that they are still in love and they share an office, but I can’t help feeling like they’ve saved all the sweetness for each other, and I get nothing but tough love. When I creak open the big wooden door, my mother hops to her feet and comes over to hug me.

“Mother, we see each other every day,” I protest.

I stand rigidly still while she wraps her arms around me. I can’t help it. I came in here on smoke, and I need to keep my nerve.

“Just give your mother a hug. It doesn’t cost anything,” my father chides from behind his big desk.

I wrap my arms around her and plaster on a smile before I sit down in the seat across from my father. My mother joins me. I already feel like I’m about to lose control, and they haven’t even started to tell me what’s going on yet.

Tensions between my parents and me have been threatening to boil over ever since I decided to move into my own place last year. I can’t handle the silence any longer, so I decide to get the ball rolling. The longer I think about it, the more likely I am to go insane.

“What did you want to meet about today?” I ask.

“Your mother and I are leaving the country for a while. We have an opportunity we cannot pass up,” Father explains.

“What? Where?” I gasp.

The words launch out, and I know that I’m not being very professional, but I can’t help it. I’m actually shocked. If they think they’re going to go gallivanting and leave me here with all of this paperwork, they’re wrong.

“We’re going to Spain. We were able to secure a meeting with a family that owns a group of luxury resorts,” Father continues. He looks happy. The lines next to his eyes crinkle up when he smiles.

“Won’t going international be a huge undertaking?” I ask. I know that they know what they are doing for the most part, but I can’t help worrying that I am going to be the one left here holding the bag.

“Yes, it’s a big deal. That’s why we’re going to Spain, dear, and we need to stay until the deal is done,” my mother adds with a smile as smooth as silk. It sort of makes my skin crawl.

I feel like I was just starting to exert some control over my own life. I finally feel comfortable in my apartment. I’ve been working on my relationship with Rhea.

I’m doing the work to make my life better, and now they are going to leave me here with all of this responsibility. I don’t have the time to manage everything they do as well as everything I’m working on.

“What if I go to Spain? I’ll close the deal,” I blurt out. I don’t know where it came from, but it’s out now.

“Calah, you’re not ready for that. We can’t trust your judgment in a foreign country!” my mother reprimands. She looks like a cat that is ready to pounce.

Her reaction only serves to light my fire, so I turn on her. “I can do it. I gave up my childhood and any semblance of a normal upbringing just so I could do this, right?”

I give Mother a flippant smile. I know I’m being a sarcastic shit, but the thing is, right now, I don’t care.

“Calah Elise!” Father yells in his standard “dad voice.” I guess that my tone didn’t slip past him, but there is no turning back now.

“I’m going to Spain or I’m leaving the company,” I announce.

“What are you talking about?” Mother’s mouth gapes open. She went from cat to goldfish in twenty seconds flat.

“Please let me know your decision by the end of the day. Good day,” I say in the most even tone I can manage before I stand up and walk out of the office.