Risking It All for a Second Chance
Auteur·e
Annie Claydon
Lectures
18,5K
Chapitres
16
CHAPTER ONE
EVERYTHING HAD BEEN going so well.
Dr Emma Owen and her driving partner, Nurse Val Sterling, had reached the halfway point of the GDK Foundation’s classic car rally. Emma’s shiny nineteen-sixties Mini had taken them south from Edinburgh in a snaking route that went through countryside and cities. The foundation’s events, held along the way to promote awareness and encourage people to donate blood and consider signing up to the various organ donor registers, had been far more successful than anyone could have dreamed. Just one more week to go, and Val and Emma could collect the sponsorship money that had been promised for the foundation. Val had taken a few minutes out from navigating the route this morning to work out how much they’d be raising per mile, and Emma had let out of whoop of achievement, as if the money was already safely in the bank...
Planning ahead like that was always a recipe for disaster. Because from there on in, everything had slowly gone pear-shaped.
The Mini’s engine had cut out a couple of times during the drive, and as they crossed the finishing line in Birmingham it had started to sputter again. Emma had pulled to one side and stopped, releasing the catch to open the bonnet. A local TV news crew who were covering the rally had zoned in on her and she’d waved them away crossly. Then all of Emma’s attention had been diverted to Val, who had tripped over a trailing cable and hit the ground with a sickening thump, knocking herself out cold for a few seconds.
An ambulance had been called and the crew had agreed with Emma’s assessment of the situation. Val expressed the expected outrage at being mollycoddled, but still, she sank back onto the ambulance gurney with an expression of relief. Emma left her car keys with one of the stewards, so they could move the Mini out of the way, and climbed into the back of the ambulance, ignoring Val’s protests and taking her hand.
She left the hospital three hours later. Val was being kept in overnight for tests, and had already decided that she’d be fine after a little rest and promised to be back before the rally set off again from Birmingham. Emma had kept her doubts to herself, telling her friend that everything would be okay and she could find another navigator easily if Val needed a few more days’ rest.
Things didn’t improve from there. She found the Mini in a service bay, away from the other cars that stood beneath the fluttering banners that announced the foundation’s rally and awareness event. Emma got in and tried to start it and the engine choked into life and then died again.
‘Hi, Emma. You’ve just got back?’ George Evans was standing by the car, his hands in the pockets of his overalls. He had the grace not to ask how things were going—the noise from the engine made that pretty obvious.
‘Yes. Val’s staying in hospital overnight but she should be back tomorrow.’
George nodded, scratching his head. He and his wife, Tess, had been retired for five years and had spent that time doing all the things they’d wanted to do but never got the chance. George was a car enthusiast, and his putting his aqua-blue 1946 Alpha Romeo through its paces was his main reason for joining the rally, although Tess’s appetite for any good cause had added to their enthusiasm. They’d quickly become the rally’s go-to couple if anyone wanted advice on mechanics or anything else.
‘You think she’ll be okay to continue?’
Emma shrugged. ‘I’ll be giving her the once-over when she gets back whether she likes it or not. I’m not going to allow Val to spend all day in the car navigating, if she’s already got aches and pains.’
‘What’ll you do for a navigator?’
Emma could think about that when the time came. ‘I might not need one. I have to see if I can get the car repaired first. It might be a blocked fuel line; I’ll see if I can get it fixed tonight.’
George pursed his lips. He knew as well as Emma did that how easy the fix was going to be rather depended on where the blockage was.
‘Why don’t you go back to the hotel and check in? Get yourself something to eat and a good night’s sleep. I’ll be here first thing and give you a hand, eh?’
Emma swallowed down the impulse to shake her head and say that she could fix the car herself, tonight. George was far too good a mechanic to believe that and he didn’t treat Emma as if she didn’t know one end of a spanner from the other, like many of the men here did.
‘Thanks, George. You’re right, as always.’
‘Off with you, then. Everything will look better in the morning.’
Everything did look a little better. The Birmingham awareness event would be starting at nine o’clock and there was a bustle of activity around the cars, which were lined up and newly polished, and in the booths where GDK staff were getting the information packs and donor cards ready. The blood donor mobile unit stood at the far end of the open space, along with a couple of smaller vans where green-uniformed NHS staff were setting up their information stand.
George and Tess were sitting on camping chairs, next to the Mini. Two grey heads, tilted towards each other because they still had something to say, even after forty years.
‘Emma...!’ Tess waved, bending to pick up the thermos at her feet. ‘I’ve got some tea.’
‘Can we save that for later, love?’ George gave her a smile. ‘We’ll be needing to get started...’
The call came at lunchtime. Val was back at their hotel and feeling fine. But she’d just heard from the hospital where she and Emma worked and been told that a donor had been found for a seriously ill patient. As transplant co-ordinator, Val really should be there, but how was Emma going to manage without her?’
‘Don’t worry about things here. You go; the transplant is far more important. You’re sure that you’re all right?’
Val assured her that she was, and that the tests had given her a clean bill of health. She apologised a couple of times more and Emma told her that she had someone lined up already who would be able to navigate for her tomorrow, injecting an optimism into her tone that she didn’t feel. She told Val she’d catch up with her when she got back to Liverpool, and they’d drink to the success of the rally, and the good health of Val’s transplant patient.
‘You’ve found someone?’ Tess had returned with sandwiches and more tea, and was staring at her as she ended the call.
‘No, but Val’s needed in Liverpool. She and David are working with a patient who’s been waiting for a kidney and pancreas transplant and now that a donor’s been found Val has to go. I don’t want her to feel guilty about leaving.’
‘What about you?’ Tess asked.
‘I’m not involved with this particular case. I specialise in managing diseases of the liver. I’ll be staying to finish the rally.’
Tess frowned. ‘Well, you should have a cup of tea and something to eat. George can repair the car while you go and find a navigator—’ She fell silent as George shook his head.
He knew. As they’d worked, Emma had told George that this was her dad’s car. That she’d been ‘helping’ him service the engine since she was so small that she had to climb up on the bumper to see what he was doing, and that when she was sixteen she’d sketched out the design for the gold sunburst pattern around the back wheel arches. After Emma had left home for medical school, Dad had waited for her to visit before he took the engine apart, and they’d worked together on the Mini until he became too ill to go out into the garage. A year after his death, this rally was just as much about her dad, and how he’d have cheered the Mini across the finishing line, as it was about the cause she felt so strongly about.
‘It’s Emma’s car, love. We’ve cleaned out the fuel transmission lines and it’s just a matter of putting everything back together now. We’ll let Emma do that while we ask round for a navigator.’
‘Do you mind?’ Emma shot George a grateful smile.
‘’Course not.’ George started to unbutton his overalls. ‘We’ll have a cup of tea and then Tess and I will go and see what we can do.’
Emma had refitted the fuel line that ran under the car, which was the hardest part, and now she just had to connect the flexible hose that ran into the carburettor. George and Tess weren’t back yet, and she knew they were probably having less success in their endeavour. The thought of having to give the rally up now was crushing.
One thing at a time. Emma bent over the engine, reaching over to position the hose, and felt something brush against the back of her knee. She jumped, looking down into a pair of brown eyes, which were accompanied by one ear up and one ear down, along with a mottled black and brown coat and a wagging tail.
‘Griff...!’ Emma’s voice splintered into an embarrassing squeak, as her throat dried and she noticed the feet planted next to him.
Griff wasn’t the problem and nor was his usual companion, David Kennedy, the CEO of the GDK Foundation. But she’d heard that David had been called away to London last night, and clearly his son was filling in for him. Josh Kennedy, temporary dog-minder, transplant surgeon and, in David’s absence, rally organiser. None of those job titles were particularly confronting; it was the ex-lover part that was making Emma’s heart thump wildly.
She’d met Josh three years ago, through David. Emma had gone to the GDK Foundation to ask for help with a patient, and in addition to giving her some very solid advice, David had introduced Emma to his son. There had been a thrilling, world-turning affair that had lasted three months, and then it had all ended badly. So badly that Emma had thought twice about participating in the rally, but she’d wanted to come and reckoned that it would be easy enough to avoid Josh.
That had worked for the last week. It hadn’t been so difficult because he’d obviously been avoiding her as well, and on the occasions when Emma hadn’t seen him coming he’d been the one to swerve suddenly away. That unspoken agreement was clearly off the table and right now it felt that fate had saved its most uncomfortable blow, for last.
But there was nothing she could do about it. Emma dragged her gaze from his green and white sneakers and looked up at him.
‘Hi, Emma. I heard that Val’s out of the hospital. Is she okay?’
Okay. At least his first question wasn’t an indignant enquiry about where the blazes she’d disappeared off to, three years ago...
‘Yes. I spoke to her a little while ago and she’s fine.’
Just as Emma was beginning to think that things couldn’t get any worse, he smiled. That blue-eyed grin was all warmth and mischief, wrapped up in one gorgeous bundle.
‘I’m glad to hear it. Fuel line problems?’
Since she was holding part of the Mini’s fuel line in her hand, it wasn’t exactly a stroke of diagnostic genius. ‘Um...yes. I think so. Dad and I have had to unblock it before.’
Josh nodded. ‘I was sorry to hear about your father’s death. How’s your mum doing?’
Her parents had liked Josh. Dad had involved him in a two-hour conversation which ranged from medicine to archaeology to the difficulty in getting spare parts for a classic car, and then nudged Emma and whispered to her not to let this one get away. Then she’d been the one to do the running...
‘As well as can be expected, I guess. It was the first anniversary of Dad’s death last month and that was hard for her, but she’s keeping busy as usual.’ Emma turned away from him quickly. The warmth in Josh’s tone made her want to cry.
Fiddling with the fuel line was a good way of not looking at Josh. Maybe he’d just come to ask about Val and when he saw she was busy he’d leave her alone. But he didn’t move, even though Griff was capering around in circles at the end of the lead.
‘I...um...wanted to ask you something.’
His tone indicated that whatever it was, Emma wasn’t going to like it. In David’s absence for the day, Josh was clearly taking his second-in-command duties seriously and he had an annoying habit of wanting to plan everything down to the last excruciating detail. Emma straightened up.
‘You heard that my father was in London last night, at an emergency board meeting?’
Curiosity got the better of Emma and she couldn’t help asking even if it did threaten to prolong the conversation. ‘I knew he wasn’t here. There’s been a problem?’
‘There were some allegations about irregularities in the way the rally’s been organised. He’s succeeded in putting them to bed.’ Josh shrugged. Clearly that was all sorted now, and wasn’t his point. ‘I’ve just heard from him; he was on his way back here, but he’s been diverted to Liverpool.’
‘Yes, Val’s...’ Emma bit her tongue. If Josh was in the same position she was, then it was better not to mention that she was in need of a navigator. ‘I heard that they’ve found a donor for the kidney and pancreas transplant that David was supervising. That’s good news.’
‘Yes. Although it means I’m on the lookout for a driver so I can finish the rally. And I gather that Val’s gone back to Liverpool as well.’
Emma froze, as the unthinkable presented itself as the obvious solution.
‘Yes, that’s right. George and Tess are finding me a replacement right now.’
At least she hoped they were. A whole week, in a Mini, with your ex. It didn’t bear thinking about. And she was sure that Josh would be able to find a partner for the Daimler. Who wouldn’t want to ride round in luxury with him as the perfect travelling companion?
‘I just spoke with George and Tess. They’re not having any luck. I was wondering if you’d like to join me and we can both finish the rally in the Daimler. It’s comfortable and you could take your choice of either driving or navigating. I can have your name put on the car’s insurance policy.’
‘No!’ At least she had the words she needed to reject that proposal. ‘This car’s started the rally and it’s going to finish.’
‘For your dad?’ Josh instantly put his finger on the reason.
‘Yes. For my dad. I’m sure you’ll find someone else.’
He nodded quietly, pushing his corn-blond hair back from his brow, in the way he always did when thinking around a problem. ‘Or we could do things the easy way. I can navigate for you in the Mini. That way we’ll both be able to finish and collect all the sponsorship money we have promised.’
‘There’s not much room.’ It was all she could think of to say, other than, Have you considered the possibility that we’ll be at each other’s throats before lunchtime?
‘We could try it out.’ Josh shrugged. ‘For the sake of the sponsorships...’
It went against the grain to be the inflexible one, because that was Josh’s speciality. She waved him towards the car and he pulled the front seat forward, letting Griff sprawl across the back seat. Then he got into the passenger seat.
His long legs were bent uncomfortably and Emma gave in to the obvious. ‘You could push the seat back a bit. The lever’s—’
Josh was already reaching for the lever under the seat. He pushed it back as far as it would go and Griff shifted a bit, then lunged forward, resting his head on Josh’s shoulder. Josh chuckled, his long fingers caressing the dog’s ears.
‘Not so bad. We’ll manage.’
His knees were no longer rammed up against the dashboard and if he kept his elbows to himself, then he wouldn’t be getting in the way. Emma sighed.
‘Do you have a restraint for Griff?’
‘Yeah, and there’s an attachment to his car harness that fits into a seat belt clip.’
Emma nodded. The seat belts in the car were the only thing that wasn’t completely authentic. The Mini had been their family car and Dad had never compromised on safety.
‘I’ve got a blanket for him as well, so he doesn’t get dog hairs all over your seats. Dad seemed to think that it would be a familiar scent for him and calm him down.’ Josh’s fingers strayed to the dog’s muzzle. It appeared that the one thing that calmed Griff was human contact, and he’d get plenty of that in the cramped confines of the Mini.
‘I suppose... All right, then. We’ll try it out for the run to Hay-on-Wye tomorrow and see how it goes. If I can get the engine running, that is.’ Josh loved the security of a definite plan. The uncertainty would at least concentrate his mind a bit in looking for viable alternatives.
Josh got out of the car, and Griff bounded up to her wagging his tail, as if he knew that they were going to be teammates and he was determined to play his part.
‘Thank you.’ His lips twitched. ‘I won’t be bringing any elephants with me. There isn’t the space.’
That was Josh all over. The smile, the charm. The acknowledgement that they did have a history, but that he could ignore the elephants in the room if she could.
‘Yes, it would make things a bit cramped.’ Emma turned, trying to keep her face straight. At this rate, the biggest hazard of driving with Josh wasn’t that they might be at each other’s throats. The temptation to connect with him on a far more intimate level was making her heart thump.
She could deal with that tomorrow. When she’d got the Mini running.
‘I’d better get on.’
‘Would you like a hand? Griff and I are both pretty enthusiastic assistants...’
Yeah, right. Blame the dog. Josh knew as much about cars as she did.
‘Thanks, I’m fine. George has been helping me and this bit’s a one-person job. I’ll text you and let you know whether this works and I get the car running.’
Admitting that she still had his number stored in her phone wasn’t so terrible, but it was embarrassing that she knew that it was still there without looking. It was doubtful that Josh’s quick perceptiveness had missed the faux pas, but he didn’t comment on it. That was a start, at least.
‘Great, thanks. If I don’t hear from you I’ll give you a call.’
He led Griff away, leaving Emma to turn back towards the car. Trying to ignore the thought that was throbbing in her head, now.
Josh still had her number too.
Emma still had her fire. Of course she did, it was something that wouldn’t—couldn’t—ever be contained. Her red hair was neatly tied back, the plait tucked down the back of her overalls, but Josh knew how it shimmered when spread loose across a pillow. He was just trying very hard not to think about it.
She would have had every right to tell him no, and to maintain the radio silence they’d been keeping for the first week of the rally. If he’d been asked his opinion, he would have said that was the thing to do and damn the consequences. But he’d had no choice but to ask, both for the sake of the sponsorships and because the rally needed as many cars as possible taking part. And it seemed that Emma had felt she had no choice but to say yes.
‘We’d better be on our best behaviour, eh, Griff?’ At the sound of his name, Griff looked up at Josh, his one-ear-up-one-ear-down making it look as if he was querying him.
‘Yeah, okay. I’ll be on my best behaviour. You’ll be fine.’ Griff’s tendency to do just as he pleased, whenever he pleased, would match Emma’s view on life perfectly. It was Josh who had to show her that he could go with the flow.
As David Kennedy’s adopted son, Josh had been given all the benefits of that—a good education and plenty of opportunities. David was his father in every possible sense of the word except one, and that was the one that mattered least to Josh. His biological father was just someone that his mother had known before David, and who Josh hadn’t known at all.
He’d felt the consequences of his actions though. His biological father had kicked his mother and Josh out when Josh was just a baby. They’d had nothing, and his mother had been afraid to ask for help, in case Josh was taken away from her. For ten years the two of them had scraped to make ends meet, moving between squats and temporary housing until Josh hardly knew which way was home. David had fallen in love with Josh’s mother’s bright and unquenchable habit of making the best of things, and Josh had added his own surly disobedience to the mix. Why bother to fit in with David when they’d be moving on soon?
But they hadn’t moved on. David and Georgie had got married and they’d formed a small, blended family of three. Josh had never had anyone he could call ‘Gran’ before, and David’s mother didn’t fit any of his expectations. A Black American woman with the cut-glass English accent of her adopted home, who brought with her a waft of expensive perfume, a shower of affection for her new daughter-in-law and grandson and fascinating stories about her travels whenever she arrived on their doorstep. He’d never had anyone he could call ‘Dad’ before either and having a father who actually knew who he was, let alone took any interest in him, was a novelty that Josh didn’t always appreciate as much as his glamorous grandmother. But it didn’t escape his notice that his mother was happy, and Georgie’s imaginative charm had blossomed to fill every corner of their lives.
David had been the quiet, unassuming glue who held it all together. He’d adopted Josh, and patiently set about giving him a stable, secure home. And despite his unspoken rule of never really trusting anyone other than his mother, Josh had started to love him. When his mother had died suddenly when he was a teen, Josh had run away, reckoning that it would save David the trouble of handing him over to social services. But David had come for him and taken him home, telling him there was no place Josh could go that he wouldn’t find him. It was tough love. Josh had been grounded for a month and told that he was expected to help out with David’s latest project in the garden. David had been there, working with him and talking to him the whole time.
Emma had seen the man that David Kennedy had helped make, which was fair enough because Josh never talked about the frightened boy. When things had started to get serious with Emma, Josh knew he had come on too strong. Her carefree love of life had reminded him so much of his mother’s, and Josh had reacted without thinking and changed his whole approach to the relationship. He’d always reckoned that he would give his own children the stable upbringing that he hadn’t had for the first ten years of his life, and he’d responded badly to anything that Emma said or did which felt like a threat to the secure home he wanted to build with her.
So she’d done the only thing possible. The only sensible thing to do in the circumstances. She’d run. Josh had been heartbroken, and known he’d been at fault. But he’d never called to explain, or tried to make things right. He’d coped the way he always had with loss, turning his back on it and pretending it had never happened.
But now, it looked as if Emma was agreeing to putting the past behind them. Forgetting was out of the question—Josh would be the first to caution her against that—but forgiving... No, that was probably out of the question too. But one man and his dog were a sufficient number of passengers in a Mini, and from the involuntary twitch of Emma’s lips when he’d mentioned the elephants, it appeared that she too felt that it was best to leave them behind.
