I Didn't Belong to You

JAMIE

When I turned fourteen, I decided to forget about Finn—at least, to try. It had been almost a year now since he left for college, and I missed him terribly.

I was disappointed that he didn’t show up with Will when he came to visit.

Don’t get me wrong; I was happy to see my brother, who I missed too. But it was strange for me to see Will without Finn—that was all.

As I said, I had decided to forget about him.

About a month ago, I had been talking to Sarah, my best friend, beside my locker at school when suddenly Douglas Style came up to ask me for a date.

Sarah had been excited for me, but my thoughts had immediately gone to Finn. My heart had skipped a beat just at the thought of him.

But then, remembering my decision, I had eventually accepted Douglas’s request. Ever since, he had been sweet with me.

I wished that my first kiss could have been with Finn, but I had to remind myself that life wasn’t a fairytale.

“I see that Douglas is late yet again,” Sarah said to me.

I was waiting for him so we could go have lunch together at the cafeteria.

“I’m sure he has a good explanation,” I replied, coming to his defense.

“You always do that. You always defend him.”

“Why the sudden change of tune? A month ago you were enthusiastic for me to go out with Douglas.”

“Yes, that’s true, I was. But now I don’t know. He seems—”

“Shh! He’s coming,” I said, interrupting what she was about to say when I saw my boyfriend coming toward us.

“Hey, bun, sorry I’m late. Um, one of the boys wanted to talk to me,” Douglas said before kissing me.

Wait! Did Douglas just lie to me? It must be my imagination playing games with me.

I let that slide, and we went to get something to eat. But at the end of the day, I was once again waiting for Douglas.

I hadn’t gotten the bus as he was supposed to take me back home. I was counting on him.

But where could he be?

Enough was enough. I couldn’t wait any longer, so I decided to go after him.

The first place I decided to look was the boys’ locker room. Right now, no one should be in there. So I was sure I wouldn’t see naked boys.

Naked boys! Why did my mind even go there? I was so not ready to see whatever there was to see about that.

Eww!!!

Except for Finn, said a little voice in my head.

Oh, shut up! I snapped at the voice. ~I’ve forgotten about him.~

I had a boyfriend now.

Yeah, keep telling yourself that, the voice replied.

Ugh!

I turned a corner and came to an abrupt halt, hearing the sound of voices.

Ah, there’s Douglas, I said to myself, spotting him across the room.

I was about to go to him when I heard my name being mentioned. I paused, my curiosity getting the better of me.

“I can’t believe you are going out with Jamie. Isn’t she a little young for you?” one of his friends asked him.

“Don’t keep reminding me. I only do this because of her brother. I mean, he’s a legend around here. I can brag about it at least. Besides, Jessica’s always there to keep me satisfied.”

“So that’s why you’re always late, you dog!”

They all started to laugh.

I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. How could he?

I was too ashamed to do anything right now, so I turned around, picked up my pace, and left the school like a coward.

Walking down the street, I couldn’t stop crying, despite knowing that people were staring at me. I couldn’t care less at the moment.

How could he do this to me? I felt so stupid.

“Jem.”

Great, now my mind was playing tricks on me. He couldn’t be here.

“Jem?”

Hearing it again, I turned around to have a look.

I couldn’t believe my eyes. Finn was here?

I didn’t waste any time in throwing myself into his arms, tears still streaming down my face.

I was sad about what had happened earlier with Douglas, but at the same time, I was crying because I was just so happy to see Finn.

My feelings were so messed up right now.

“Hey, what’s wrong, darling?” Finn wrapped his arms around me, calming me down a bit.

Without leaving his arms, I told him about Douglas and what I had overheard earlier in school. I could have sworn I felt Finn stiffen.

“That prick! If he weren’t a minor, I would’ve given him a piece of my mind right about now.” I could hear the anger in his voice.

I tightened my grip on him, clinging to his shirt. I couldn’t help but think that I had found my own knight in shining armor.

“Come on, Jem. Let me buy you lunch, and then I’ll take you home. What do you say?”

What?

He wants, he wants…

But what are you doing? Say something, anything.

“I would love to,” I manage to answer. “Um, just have to call Ma to warn her. Can I borrow your cell?”

He handed me his phone, and I dialed my mom’s number.

“Finn, is everything okay?” she asked, answering the call.

“Ma, it’s me. Finn is in town and wants to bring me to lunch to catch up.”

“That’s nice of him. I know he’s in town. He came to see us today when you were at school. Tell him to bring you before ten, okay?”

“Thank you, Ma, and I will.”

After I ended the call, he took me to a little restaurant not far from here. Along the way, my heart started pounding harder and harder until that was the only sound I could hear.

The waitress who came to take our order took a good look at Finn, as if she couldn’t stop herself.

I noticed with disappointment that he looked at her as well, and he seemed to appreciate what he saw.

“Hey, why so moody all of a sudden?” Finn asked, turning to look at me.

Shit, he saw that! Say something so that he won’t get suspicious of the real reason.

“Thinking about Douglas,” I replied with shame.

Liar! Liar! Pants on fire!

“Jamie, I know it would be hard, especially if he’s your first love, but you have to forget about that bastard. It won’t do you any good if you don’t.”

“Is that what you did with Nathalie? You succeeded in forgetting her?”

Shit, why did I bring her up?

“I did,” he replied simply.

“Maybe you should give me your recipe of how to do it,” I quipped.

“No, trust me, my way won’t help you, darling. You have to find your way.”

Maybe I’ve already forgotten about him, and all it took was to see you in front of me, I thought.

That was it. I was doomed to love this one who I could never have. Sometimes, life was unfair.

“So how come you’re here?” I asked, trying to change the topic.

“Will and I made a promise to each other. When either of us is in town, we go and see each other’s family.

“He asked me to look in on you. He’s worried. To tell you the truth, so was I. I also wanted to make sure you were okay, I guess.”

Tell me something, Universe—how could I forget him when he said such things?