Single Mom's Mistletoe Kiss
Autor:in
Rachel Dove
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Kapitel
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CHAPTER ONE
LORD, THESE CHAIRS are surprisingly uncomfortable. I’ll have to mention it to Nya when I’m back at work. Get the cushions restuffed or something.
Marnie adjusted herself in the seat, smiling at the other visitors in the waiting room as she waited for her turn. It was weird to see the other side of the curtain, so to speak. It was health visitor day, and she was here as a patient. A new experience for her. She felt a little weird, used to being the one helping new mums.
It was a cold December day, one that she’d been looking forward to since having her baby. The last time she was here, she was giving birth. Her baby being delivered by the colleagues she loved and cherished in her own place of work. She loved the symmetry of it all. It gave her a real sense of belonging, and her previously wanderlust-filled heart was not only healing, but it was also full. She’d gone from broken-hearted single midwife, to becoming a mother in the community that she loved and lived in.
She’d come so far from that beach in Bali. From the girl laughing in the photos with Oliver, as the world’s sights and landmarks provided the backdrop to their trip snaps. Living with a lie she didn’t discover till it was painfully late. She’d returned home with sand in her suitcase and devastation in her heart. Carey Cove had been somewhere to retreat to. Somewhere to start a new life, one she’d never thought would be on the cards.
Now she was the rather tired hormonal mother, sitting with the other new mums and babies in the beautifully festive decorated waiting room, waiting for her six-week check with the other patients. Her back was aching, and the seat of the thinly cushioned chair was too rigid for her still recovering body. Violet snuffled in her arms, and she adjusted her to stop the arm cradling her going dead. Her newborn daughter settled straight back to sleep again, and, looking at her, Marnie was overwhelmed by a rush of love once more.
She often felt it. It slapped her right in the face sometimes. When she looked at her child and wondered how on earth she’d got so lucky. PCOS had been part of her working and professional life for years. She’d held many women, crying over their condition. What it meant for their fertility. For the children they wanted but couldn’t have. She was one woman who didn’t take her fertility for granted, ever. She’d been lucky, she knew. So lucky, and whenever she looked at Violet, she was reminded of that.
Yesterday she’d cried tears of pure joy because Violet had sneezed in a cute way. The day before that, it was seeing her tiny little outfits all freshly washed and drying on the radiator. She was besotted with her, utterly in love with the wondrous bundle in her arms. She still couldn’t quite believe she was a mother. She’d always thought that it was something that would never happen to her, so every sneeze, every little snuffle—it was all just so joyful.
She’d given birth here, of course, so she had gone through every experience she could here. In the best place too. Her place. Hers and that of the women who ran the place. The men too, of course, but everyone knew who the real bosses were. Even St Isolde’s, the hospital in Falmouth they worked with, knew how instrumental Carey House was in the care of the patients in the community and beyond. Theo was one of the main doctors there, and she knew that Carey House held a special place for him too. Everyone felt it, the minute that they walked through the doors.
She wondered how her replacement was getting on. She hadn’t spotted any new midwives there so far, and the girls had been very quiet on the work front. They kept telling her to forget the place, and her patients. That all was in hand, and she should just enjoy the time with her child. Which she was doing, but she couldn’t quite quell the curiosity about her replacement. They were in their second week now, she knew they’d be feeling pretty settled already. Carey House didn’t have the need for many agency staff; once people came, they tended to stay. It spoke a lot for the place, she thought. Whoever was taking over her role, she knew that they’d enjoy their time there. It was hard not to.
Even now, the waiting room felt more like a cosy sitting room rather than the usual colder, clinical waiting areas health buildings usually defaulted to. Here, it was more like coming to a boutique hotel to have a baby. It was a unique place, and the staff who ran it worked tirelessly to keep it that way. It wasn’t uncomfortable sitting here waiting, aside from the slightly lumpy chairs. She found she was enjoying being an observer for once. Violet was great, but with her cottage being the only occupied house on her lane, it was quiet. Violet couldn’t exactly talk back yet. It was nice to be amongst the chatter of life once again.
The other mums were chatting amongst themselves. She heard the odd snatch of conversation. The whole place was festooned in Christmas decorations, which reminded her that she was normally trimmed up at home by now. She’d made a start, but, with Violet to care for, she was finding it a little harder to get her bigger jobs done. She had enough to do sanitising every surface in the house when she got a little restless or bored. Not that Violet was an annoyance. She couldn’t stop looking at her daughter, marvelling at every little noise and facial expression. Babies were far from boring, but she was missing the routine. The laughs with her colleagues.
The twinkly lights from the tree nearby were making her feel cosy, and tired. Hopefully she’d be able to get a nap in that afternoon, while Violet slept. She could leave the rest of the decorations to another day. She’d made a start with adorning her fence with cane decorations, but some of her other pieces took a bit of putting together. It wasn’t as if she had neighbours to compete with. It was just her and Violet on their little lane. She had no one to impress but her babe, and that was just the way she liked it. One of the women laughed across the room, and she found herself listening into their conversations.
‘A whole six hours! Wow, I wish mine would sleep that well. I swear, I slept in front of the dryer the other night. The sound was the only thing keeping this little monkey from screaming the place down!’
‘Don’t talk to me about cracked nipples. With my second, I was about ready to punch the next person who called me Dolly Parton. I was in so much pain. What’s the point of huge jugs when they feel like two hard rocks? I swear, I don’t know how we conceived our third after that. I was done!’
A giggle of laughter rang out now and again. Women swopping horror stories. Marnie sat there, cradling Violet to her, enjoying every minute. Now she wasn’t just a bystander to these stories. She didn’t have to just nod and empathise any more! Now she had her own stories to share. Although she was feeling pretty smug at the moment. Things were good. Hardly any hormone swings at all. If she could get some decent sleep, life would be pretty perfect. Just as she’d hoped it would be, after Oliver, her no-good lying ex, after everything she went through to become a mother. She felt as if Violet was the prize, her future dream realised by her and her alone.
‘These chairs are a bit hard, aren’t they?’ Another mother sitting next to her shuffled in her own seat. Her baby was sitting at her feet in his infant carrier, wearing a little blue outfit of dungarees and a giraffe T-shirt. He was fast asleep.
‘I’m glad you said that. I thought it was just my creaking back,’ Marnie replied with a smile. ‘I love his outfit.’
‘Aw, thanks, it’s his second change of clothes this morning, to be honest. We had a bit of an explosive-number-two incident this morning. I filled a washing machine load with everything he marked. It was up to his ears!’
The two women laughed together. ‘I’m Vicky, by the way, and the poop machine is Benjamin.’
Marnie shook her hand, feeling the warmth from her fingers wrap around her own.
‘Marnie, and this is my little Violet. Is he your first?’ Marnie didn’t recognise her, but she was on maternity leave from Carey House, the cottage hospital she was currently sitting in. She didn’t deal with every mother who came through the doors. She felt a pang at missing work, but it soon passed when she looked at Violet again. She was in no rush to get back quite yet. Delivering babies was addictive, and it was nice to be back in the butter-coloured stone building that she loved, but she wasn’t in that much of a rush for her maternity leave to be over. She wanted to enjoy every moment with her baby daughter before things got hectic. ‘Violet’s mine.’
‘No, I’ve got a three-year-old too. Jaxen. They say you forget how tiring it is, your first. Feels like my firstborn sometimes, when he’s screaming at three a.m. It’s amazing what you forget. Or block out!’ Vicky laughed again, and Marnie nodded.
‘Ah, well, it’s all new to me still.’ She didn’t let on that she worked there as a midwife, had delivered hundreds of babies inside these very walls. ‘It might just be the hormones, but I’m loving every minute.’ Marnie knew it wasn’t just the hormones, but she wasn’t about to wax lyrical in the waiting room. Even at three a.m., when she was feeding her daughter and feeling as though she hadn’t slept in a month, she knew it was worth it. Every little bit of her journey had given her the perfect little bundle in her arms, and she didn’t take a second of it for granted. Or forget how long she’d longed for her. How much effort it had taken to get there on her journey to motherhood.
‘Nothing like it, is there?’ Vicky agreed, looking down at her son Benjamin who was awake now and busy trying to eat his little fist. ‘I swear, I never thought I’d have another. You know, you get busy, money gets tight. He’s worth it though.’
‘I totally agree,’ Marnie said, thinking about the months of IVF she’d gone through. She’d go through it again tomorrow to get to be sitting in this chair today. ‘It’s the best. Tiredness and poo incidents aside, of course.’
The two women got to chatting, and Marnie found that she was really enjoying herself. It was like being admitted to a club that she’d been denied access to before. She felt as if she’d been looking through the windows of parenting as a bystander for so long. Wondering whether she would ever get her chance, like millions of other women out there who found it so easy. Sometimes she couldn’t believe she’d done it. She had arrived, and her baby had been delivered by her colleagues in this very place. Well, had she taken a longer walk, Violet might have been born on the beautiful front lawn! It had felt so right, as if she’d come full circle.
She was a member now, a fully-fledged mum. No longer would she have to listen to anecdotes of sleepless nights and other parenting nuggets that she wasn’t a party to. She finally had the status that she’d longed for and feared she’d never have. Mother. Vicky was telling her about the local nursery in the area that her son went to, but she suddenly fell silent.
‘Vicky?’ she asked, wondering why she was staring across the room doing a pretty good impression of a goldfish out of water. ‘Are you okay?’ Benjamin passed wind and even that didn’t rouse Marnie’s waiting-room companion. Her lips moved, but nothing came out. Marnie looked around the waiting room. The mothers were all aflutter in the room, she noticed now. She felt as if the wintry temperature had risen by a few notches, felt the tension change in the air. At her side, Vicky’s elbow jutted out, knocking Marnie’s.
‘What?’ Another nudge, and Marnie turned to see what she was looking at agape. Another new mum patient had just come back into the waiting room, and a man was standing talking to her, his back to them. Marnie noticed his clothing and frowned. He was dressed in the staff uniform. ‘Who is that?’ she half mumbled. She took in his rear profile without meaning to. It was hard not to; the man was like a side of beef. He was easily six feet tall. She could tell from her sitting and gawking position. Trust her to be on maternity leave when they had a hot locum in.
A locum... Oh, no. Was this muscled Adonis her temporary replacement?
‘Have you seen him before?’ she asked Vicky from the side of her mouth.
Her replacement was supposed to be in situ already. Perhaps he wasn’t hers. Or rather, her replacement. Marnie shook her head. Maybe the hormones had resurfaced a little bit. She was a teeny bit hot and bothered by the vision in front of her. She kept wondering what he looked like. The back of his head was pretty enough. Short dark brown hair atop a strong neck and a thick set of shoulders, leading down to a well-packed torso.
‘No, and I don’t know where they got him from,’ Vicky breathed at the side of her. ‘But they should get more like him. He’s easy on the eye, isn’t he?’ She didn’t whisper the last bit, and Marnie was sure that she saw the man’s back stiffen. She could see the set in his shoulders rise somewhere around his earlobes. She blushed despite herself.
Caught ogling a man on her six-week check. She could just imagine what her colleagues would make of that.
She fanned her face with her free hand, trying to circulate the air back into her lungs. That was not what she was here for.
The mystery Adonis kept talking to the mother, giving her a pamphlet while the patient thanked him. Marnie focused back on Violet, trying to distance herself from the conversation. She never earwigged in waiting rooms, not on private conversations. She wasn’t about to start now. Or here. She was here as a new mum, just like the others. Here for her six-week check, something she’d been looking forward to. Another club she was now a member of after waiting and wanting Violet so long. She was still on leave. It wasn’t her concern, not yet.
Who was he, though? Had he come from an agency?
‘See, you can’t even speak. How come he works here? It’s a bit of a waste, if you ask me. He should work in the fertility clinic.’ Vicky was obviously not afraid to speak her mind. Or one to lower her voice. ‘Cart before the horse, that way.’
God love the Cornish candour, Marnie thought to herself as she saw the man turn slightly in their direction. His ears were obviously burning. Quite obviously in fact. The tips of them were bright pink. She cleared her throat to stop the laughter that threatened to burble up as she looked away quickly. The man returned to seeing the woman and the baby she was holding out.
‘I think he heard you.’ She smiled at her rather funny seat-mate. ‘I don’t know who he is, I’ve never seen him before either.’ She didn’t bother divulging her bemusement and slight irritation about it either. Or the fact that she’d watched the way his shoulders had bunched the material of his uniform as he’d turned towards them. She found herself wishing she’d had the energy to put some make-up on that morning. She knew she didn’t look her best. Sleep deprivation did that, despite all her planning.
Wait, what? It’s just a man, Marnie! What do you care anyway?
‘Well, I think you might be about to find out.’ Vicky broke through her flip-flopping thoughts as the man turned and set his eyes in their direction. And his rather long legs. She was wondering to herself what shoe size he was when his feet stopped right in the middle of the room.
‘Heads up, ladies!’ Vicky stage-whispered as he approached. The ladies in the waiting room all collectively sat up, smoothing down errant locks and reaching for compacts from their changing bags. Marnie remained frozen in place. She wasn’t about to preen for a man. Even a huge hunk in midwife’s clothing. She couldn’t have moved if she’d wanted to. He was looking straight at her, and she couldn’t seem to break her gaze away. Hazel eyes demanded it, and she found that she couldn’t look away from them.
Was this her replacement? Oh, her workmates were in trouble now. A heads-up would have been nice, ladies!
‘Ladies, if I could just grab a second of your time.’ He nodded to the health visitor who was busy weighing babies in the corner of the room. ‘Sorry for the intrusion.’
She heard Vicky mutter something along the lines of ‘you can grab what you like’ beside her as she nodded, almost mute. The back of his head was unfortunately not his best feature, as she had previously pondered. The front of his head, well. Wow. The man was gorgeous, for want of a better word. Fit, for another. He was like a huge tree trunk standing in front of her. Momentarily an image of her as a squirrel popped into her head, but she shook it back out when he continued talking. She tried not to focus on the shade of hazel in his eyes. It reminded her of the trees in spring, the ones that grew around the place. The green and the brown flecks in his eyes making a colour all of their own. One she couldn’t quite place.
‘I’m Ash Ellerington, the new temporary midwife. You might have to bear with me a moment, ladies.’ He raised his deep voice to address the room. ‘It’s my first day here at Carey Cove, but I’m a very quick study. I know my predecessor is already really missed, but I hope that I can help while I’m here.’
His smile was charming, and Marnie watched the women all fall under his spell. Further than they already had from mooning over his physique.
Well, he certainly has a way with women.
He turned back to her, bringing his smile with it. She looked away.
I don’t think so. You’re not winning me over.
‘Replacing who?’ she asked, already knowing the answer but still not wanting it to be true. He was late, anyway! First day today? What the heck? He was supposed to have started two weeks ago! She thought of her patients, of her colleagues sharing her workload while she looked after her new baby and got to grips with being a single mum. The thought irked her. Why wasn’t he here two weeks ago? Why had they waited for him, and not just booked someone else? The man looked around the room, noticing the obvious interest in their conversation.
‘One of the midwives, maternity leave,’ he replied vaguely. And rather dismissively, Marnie thought to herself. She’d already made the decision to dislike him, it seemed. Did he not even know who he was replacing? The girls must have told him her name. She felt the pang of work stress down her spine and hated him for making her feel like this on such a good day. ‘If you’ll excuse me, ladies, I had better get on.’ He half bowed at them, which made Vicky swoon at the side of her. Marnie kept her body rigidly straight, watching him turn and walk away.
He had better be doing a good job. First day indeed!
She watched him talk easily with a couple of mothers at the other side of the room, and she busied herself with her turn, her name being called to go and have herself and her baby checked. Soon she was focused back on her appointment and Violet. The six-week check was important, and Violet was hitting all her milestones. She didn’t see the man again, and her appointment was over before she thought about him when it was time to leave.
She’d bundled them both up against the cold, and she was not long out of the doors of Carey House when she heard her colleague’s voice from behind her.
‘Marnie, glad I caught you! Have you got a minute?’
She turned to look at her friend Nya and was shocked to see Ash standing beside her. She felt her eyes narrow in his direction instinctively. As if she were observing a cuckoo in her nest.
‘Hi, Nya! I would have said hi, but I know you guys are busy.’ She looked Ash in the eye. ‘First days tend to be busy.’ Her dig went unnoticed by Nya, but she was satisfied to see Ash wince.
Nya had since closed the gap between them both and enveloped her in a huge hug. Violet protested from the car seat in Marnie’s hands. Nya bent down to look closer at the little girl. ‘Sorry, my little beauty! We just really miss your mummy here!’ She reached out and smoothed her blankets a little against the cold before turning her hundred-watt smile back to Marnie. She sure was happy these days. Marnie was so happy for her friend, and Theo was such a great guy. It was easy to love the two of them together. ‘I didn’t want to keep you out in this December weather, but I did want you to meet Ash.’
Ash stepped forward then and grew about a foot. He seemed to stand straighter as he locked his eyes on hers again. She thought of her irritation that this man was taking over her job. Go figure. She was trying to live her life without a man, and now she had one covering for her career. Seeing her patients. Still, it was hardly his fault. He was here now, that was the main thing. She’d be back before she knew it, and he’d be gone. The last man in her life that she would ever need. She rather liked the sound of that. Another piece of the man-free plan to tick off.
Nya was still chattering away animatedly about the comings and goings; about the Christmas babies they were expecting to arrive. Ash cut through her voice and held out his hand.
‘Hi, Marnie. I’m Ash, as you know.’ He blushed. ‘Nice to meet you. I hear I have a lot of midwife skills to match up to.’ He raised a brow, and she smiled politely right back.
‘Nice to meet you, Ash. I hope—’
Then she made a mistake. A rather big mistake that took her completely by surprise.
She shook his hand. Now, it could have been the fact that she was blindsided, seeing this man and realising he was filling her shoes. It could have been the fact that while she was loving being a new and proud single mum, she was also a woman. A hormonal one at that. She could have put it down to many things, but she knew what she felt. It was as though a bolt of lightning had shot through her body. The very second he closed his fingers around hers, it was as if they had welded to each other. She’d gone from feeling electrocuted by his touch, expecting them to be blown apart, to being a hundred per cent certain that they were stuck together for ever.
When she managed to remember where she was, she focused on his face. He looked as confused as she must look. His lips parted, and his tongue peeked out, moistening his dry mouth. She understood. Hers felt like the Sahara. She swallowed, realising that she’d stopped talking mid-sentence. Instead of replying like a competent professional woman, she openly gawked at him instead. Their hands were still stuck in the handshake between them. Marnie seemed to slightly recover first.
‘Sorry, I was going to say welcome, and thank you. I know everyone will make you feel at home here—it’s our thing,’ she said in a rush, and that was when she managed to get her fingers to move. She broke the contact, and saw Nya shooting her an odd look.
What was wrong with her?
Loved-up Nya was so happy. She hoped Nya didn’t get any ideas. She wasn’t about to be subject to some maternity-leave cupid caper. He could cover her job, sure. That was as far as she was willing to go with another man ever again.
Ash didn’t bear witness to the women’s little exchange. He’d already tilted his head to look at Violet. Marnie watched him grin at her daughter, and then the little madam grinned right back.
She smiled! At him! Have I taught you nothing, Padawan?
She would have to be having words with her progeny.
‘Smiling already, eh? Clever girl!’
He pulled a funny face at Violet, and Marnie watched as her daughter showed her cover man a gummy smile. A full, beaming grin of pure happiness to see him. It was as if ruddy Santa Claus himself had peeped his head in to say hello. It made Marnie’s heart clench.
Yeah, post-partum hormones and Christmas don’t mix. I’m one Hallmark movie away from being a total festive softie. I’ve been waiting for her to smile, and she gives it up to him? I hope it was just wind.
She knew better, but even the midwife in her was willing to go along with the self-told lie.
You’re smiling away at our enemy, little one.
She had expected her daughter to have her back, but obviously she was a sucker for a handsome face. Not that he was handsome, per se. Well, he was, if you went for the whole tall, dark and handsome package. Which she didn’t.
She wrapped her coat around her a little tighter as the wind picked up around them. The summers here in Carey Cove were amazing, and the winters beautiful, but cold. Ash gave her a look of concern, but she ignored him. She didn’t need his help.
‘I’d better get her in the car.’ She held the car seat a little closer to her body. ‘Nice to meet you. Nya, call me.’
‘You too.’ He took a step back from Violet and her. ‘It was lovely to meet you both.’ He nodded to Violet. ‘I’ll let you get warmed up.’ Still feeling frazzled from the excitement of her morning, and freezing rapidly, she looked at Violet. She was still looking at Ash, bundled up. It looked as if Marnie wasn’t the only Richards girl to try to size him up. Violet was staring at him so hard her eyes were almost crossed.
‘Thanks.’ She smiled at him while avoiding those hazel eyes and nodded to Nya. ‘I’ll see you soon, Ash.’
The two of them said their goodbyes, and Marnie headed off. When she was out of sight, she stopped and looked at the palm that had touched Ash. She could still feel a tingle on her skin that she knew was nothing to do with the Cornish winter.
She was still thinking about him when she got home. The jolt she’d felt when she’d shaken his hand was still affecting her now.
What the heck was that?
She’d had quite a crush on a few people when she was pregnant. Idris Elba in...well, anything, for example. She’d watched The Avengers on repeat. She understood that behaviour. She was a midwife, she knew all the stories, all the tales of weird cravings and urges. Crushes on celebrities while they were growing a human. But now? She was done with men. Ash felt like a fence post blocking her new man-free life. One where she delivered the next generation of babies and raised her daughter. All on her own. Just the two Richards women. They were going to be the Gilmore Girls, sans the cute and rather surly café owner. That was what Ash was. He was a café owner in the plot of her life. An unnecessary character that she knew belonged on the cutting-room floor.
Lightning bolts? Pah.
She didn’t need it. Or want it. Plus, he was leaving anyway. He was a temp, filling in for her. She reminded herself of her earlier resolve. She was never going to be at the whim of a man, ever again. She’d had her baby without a man at her side. IVF had enabled her to finally follow her heart and fulfil her dream of becoming a mother. If she could do all of that single, then she wasn’t about to change it.
Not that he was even interested, of course. She’d seen the odd look he’d given her after her handshake. Violet liked him, but she was a fickle baby. Her mother had plenty of time to teach her beloved child that a woman could do anything she wanted. With or without a smiling man with lightning-bolt handshakes. Ash would be gone soon, and she’d be back at work. Job done.
